Now that I work for my professors all day and have my writing classes at night, I have come to appreciate the weekend very much. I'm sad to see it go.
At least with how busy I've been, I haven't had time to dwell on losing you earlier this week. I hope that if there's an afterlife you're cracking open a beer and making fun of me like you used to.
[center [size10 Take me back to three weeks ago.
Take me back to having sushi, korean bbq, even that fancy italian restaurant that we were underdressed for.
Even the little things like groceries, shopping at the mall, cuddling in bed..
I want it all back..
In about less than 4 days.. I'll be busy.
You are already busy..
I just want any time I can have with you.
And you alone..]]
[center ahh ;; I love this song. and the entire soundtrack for the game, but this song especially. it sounds so pretty.
Damn, Atmosphere/AtomicBomb/Bombi. Thought by now you would figure out no one here will like you or love you.
Also really original coming from you hacking accounts and sending screenshots to no one who cares then bragging about it like you're some hero. Don't you got a job with shifts to pick up, mate? Or did they figure you're not worth anything either and fire you?
Well hopefully that set things clear for you. <3
[google-font https://fonts.googleapis.com/css?family=Josefin+Slab][Josefin+Slab [#9F81F7 [b [size16 This is why they don't like you, and end up running away from you. Going out of their way to [i avoid] you. Take a hint. You're nothing but annoying.]]]]
I am glad that this boy keeps trying so hard to annoy me. Yep. Very glad. But that's okay I escaped to solitude with my computer and all is well. Fack humans. Who needs em anyway. I'm so antisocial jeez.
Damn. After all that fuss.
And you're just gonna go and do what you claim everyone else is gonna do? Tch. All talk. You've always been all talk. Why is it everyone only remembers the bad things? Because of shit like this. You say you're "something" hoping everyone will believe you. But no, that's not how it works. You can say you try to be this person. But truly, a person who is kind and caring wouldn't claim to be some kind of savior. No. They wouldn't fetishize it like you. And even so, a kind person wouldn't do what you're planning on doing. After all the lies you've fed him. Of course you'd turn on him. He just couldn't love you the way you wanted. Kind of feel bad for him. What ever, bruv. You've got like three other excuses you hide behind as always. Keep using them. Get professional help-for Christ's sake.
I have chose an alternative to smoking
I have taken up drinking coffee instead
Admittedly, something I'm working on
[center [pic http://i.imgur.com/26f4dgk.jpg]]
[google-font https://fonts.googleapis.com/css?family=Josefin+Slab][Josefin+Slab [center [#9F81F7 [b [size16 I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a little nervous. Meeting people isn't really my forte. It makes my anxiety go absolutely haywire. Still, I'm excited. I wish it could happen sooner that it probably will end up happening. I have the puppy to take care of now, and scrounging up the money [s and excuses] will take enough time as it is.
Even then though, it's a promise.
In other news, pretty sure I'm breaking out in an itchy rash cause I'm stressed. Yay. =w=]]]]
[i [#191970 It's a nice change of pace to see yourself mold into the person who you want to be. Let me start off with saying at the age of thirteen, I have been emotionally dependent on a man. Very brief, the stereotypical, "Oh, I can't live a single day without you." Things like that. And as a result, it ended with me losing balance of the person who I was meant to be.]]
[i [#191970 My grades dropped, I self harmed as a coping mechanism, I didn't eat, I gained weight, I went through disassociation, everything. What I'm trying to say to everyone who may stumble upon this is, "Things will get better. As long as YOU take initiative."]]
[i [#191970 It has been ages since I've EVER gotten an A on anything. And to think I've gotten A's on my quizzes and tests is a BIG step up. I'm hoping to keep this pace to become the COTA I was meant to be. (:]]
[i [#191970 That is all, have a nice weekend and happy labor day to everyone who may be curious enough to read!]]
Might stream again today. Okay I probably will XD
I am not sure about video editing yet but I'll figure something out I feel bad having to ask for help DX
That aside last night I found a lot of inner peace and zen and that helped me a lot.
That aside I hope today is another good day ^^
On another note I placed at my career high 4080 SR woot.
May play on PC the heroes I play translate to PC pretty easy people say.
Lucio and Zen require aim though so gotta practice at that again yargh.
How's that restraining order taste, bitch? xD
Maybe you ain't put your damn hands on my little cousins anymore? EAT IT. TASTE IT. Enjoy what time you got left, too, cause when the trial comes I am going to spin so many liessssssss~ Just. For. You. Because you're a special kind of sick, so you deserve a special kind of reception. They are going to LOVE your nasty pedo ass in prison you sick piece of shit.
In other news, I make 10.75 an hour at this new place, 13.75 for overtime.
Bitch I'm gonna buy allllll the videogames~ Fine af, [i what up].
[center My plan was amazing. My plan was great but if I can't get a place for the babies there's no point. I can't just abandon them. I can't handle them as well as I could before but that's not fair to them. I'll just suck it up. I'll try to cope and deal with everything. I'll try to clean what I can to what degree I can and if it's still not good enough for her I don't know what to tell her. I'll start with my room since I know I'll prolly just throw out 90% of what's in it as is. This kills me because I don't know if I can even trust my own mother. It's one thing of I can't trust other people in my life but it's fucking pathetic that I can't trust the woman who helped force me into existence.]
[center To risk sounding dramatic I'd rather be dead right now.]
[Center [size10 What. A. Bitch. Met this guy in WoW after joining a random group whos 22. In a gay marriage. Been with the guy since 17 and just alot of other shit that's similar to us. But we fucking both live in Rome and I've just been rolling tonight. Dude's chill asf and works at Wendys and doesnt like it when people come in asking for McNuggets. So I told him that I swear after his few day break I'm coming out there and gunna ask him for some McNuggers. He threatened to slap a hoe. The hoe being me and it was a beautiful start to a fucked up friendship. I swear tho if he ever gets the idea that I'm gunna be out walking as much as he does to play Pokemon go, he's got another thing coming. He better be pulling me in a wagon if thats the case. Nah bitch. Also this "Im spoiled I get what I want." Bitch where? You aint gettin that from me, babe. In all honesty tho it'll probably be both of us nagging at eachother about wanting to get what we want but neither of us getting what we want so we have to compromise. I aint complaining.]]
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