Can there just be ONE fucking day where you don't go out of your way to make me hate myself? I mean, SHIT, even my birthday got fucked for your enjoyment. Leave me. The fuck. Alone. I do not like you. I do not love you. I do not care about you or your problems, as you do not care for me and mine. Disappear.
It would be the one gift you've ever given me, that I would truly and desperately want.
You wouldn't even care if I was gone forever, and I don't hold that against you.
Maybe it would be better if I would just go...
[center [youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5xSF8Qr0-wQ]]
[center [pic https://i.imgur.com/XygzLg9.gif]][center Guys, I'm about to fucking scream, like god damn son.]
[center [size10 When the fuck squad returns and everybody hears that Jaws music.]]
[center [pic https://78.media.tumblr.com/70ed6ec91f54743a294500c1b129658c/tumblr_ozjs46ycWM1wevqp3o1_500.gif]]
[center [size10 "I'm having mix feelings like usual, feeling happy about some situations and vice versa about others. Let's take it back a notch, I just purchased my green hair dye yesterday and it will be here tomorrow night or I will get it tuesday and dye my hair over the thanksgiving break and I'm super duper happy about that. But I'm so depressed that it's so hard to draw and I have an art project and I need it finished before the 30th...
"Then I'm having anxiety about what I want for christmas, actually don't know and black friday is going to be around the corner. And then this well be the second holiday without my brother and multiple ones without my nana. But I guess, I'm going to have to enjoy it with my new family."
[center [youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HHdyED6vx4M]]
When Asher knows that good shit
[center [youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pblLezY22r8]]
Honestly, I’m pissed. How come you want to fire me? Yeah, I missed five days, I brought in a doctor’s note proving I was highly contagious and was unable to work because I had the flu, I actually show up for work, and I do my job and some other bitch’s job because she ditches work to get high.
This girl literally ditches work for two weeks at a time and then leaves early on the days she actually shows up. Sorry, but me wanting to take off on Thanksgiving to go to a pow-wow is all I asked. I even asked to work on Christmas to get away from my chaotic family so I didn’t have to see my bitch of an aunt.
I even told them before hand that I’ll be out of town for this pow-wow. It’s a part of my culture and this year it’s my turn to go with my friend to help set something up for her mom.
Really?! What is this middle school? You went to my old place of employment told my mother figure I’m going to be fired?! How old are you, 12? Jesus... I literally had a panic because of this.
Not sure what I did to them but my cookies look like they are on steroids. I think there was too much flour so they didn't spread very well. Whatever I'm serving them to the little brats tomorrow because they were for me to have fun, not for the ungrateful bitches to complain about. They can just not eat them I don't care. I got to spend some quality time with my gran listening to her old records and that was all I needed for my birthday.
[center [size10 The fact that I'm slowly retaining shit is still progress I gotta remember that and honestly with how much I'm into korean music it'll be helpful. I follow enough artists on instagram that learning and retaining and then utilizing the hangul should be pretty simple. The pronunciation will be easier once I start learning more and can pick up shit in songs, and then that will also help me retain the meanings in words. I always thought I'd never be able to learn a language cause I pretty much just thought my brain was shit at holding information but I just needed to find a language I could actually utilize and as much as I love chinese it's a bitch and a half just cause the tone marks alone and completely forgetting about the written language then add on top of that I prolly wouldn't be able to utilize it even half as much as I will korean and it was gonna be a mess. Still tho chinese is on my list of languages to learn. still my one true love of languages but I'm def having a blast with korean cause I've learned that I've been saying Choiza's name wrong but now i'm over here just saying it 50 times over. You ever wanna know what it's like to get tired of hearing someone's name just come hang out with me and listen to me just repeat his fucking name over and over and over again.]]
I'm going to need to relearn how to make a fucking essay because hey, if I'm going to have to convince these suits why I'm worth their damn time I might as well use every talent I got.
[size10 "Makes perfect since, I'm having everything blocked on my school laptop. And I mean like, Youtube, Facebook, Tumblr, Discord, Deviantart, you know simple things. But what makes me really pissed is the fact that it's blocking me at home! At fucking home! I can't edit or even enjoy listening to music. It's like, maybe I don't want to listen to music on my phone or watch stuff because I don't know, I should be able to do this shit on my laptop? Like what is my guardian paying for? I do my school work, hell I'm a A student, but I guess that doesn't matter. "
"I'm super pissed, my mood has done a complete three sixty. Like today I just purchase my hair dye and it should be here anytime next week and I'm going to dye it over thanksgiving break. I was happy, and then I get this blocking shit -m-. I fucking give up. "
"Thanks, I'll just be drawing. Peace bitches!"
[Center I really love my new digi piano. It's a lame piece of plastic with only 61 keys, but I love it and feel so nostalgic merely from playing it again after so long. Kinda spent an entirety of my night just softly tapping the keys while on a phone call, and it provided some hilarious shits and giggles due to just having a emotional melody playing in the background while we bitched about life and failed romances.]
[Center Not at all implying flirtatious intent, merely because this came out of the mouth of a dear friend .... but due to this one stupid boy I dated not to long ago, my self-esteem on my appearance shattered. I got told that I was beautiful and it made me feel so nice.]
[Center Friendship is solid key for getting over heart breaks. I'm glad we got to talk :)]
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