“What?”

Adam stopped his unrelenting pacing and turned to the boy who spoke, illogically surprised that he was not alone on the street.

“I’m fine. Everything is great. I just…” He trailed off for a second and looked down at his feet, trying to come up with a well thought out, believable lie. Suddenly, his eyes lit up and his head snapped up. He tried out a fake, nervous smile and gazed evenly at the other boy. “… I just forgot my mother’s birthday. She is kind of making life at home difficult for me… ” He lied.

“But, umm… Thanks for the concern. Really.”

Adam’s next exhale was drawn out into an exaggerated sigh as he tried unsuccessfully to relax his racing heart. Even as what he thought to be reality crumbled and his organized mess of a life began to fold under the pressure of that one thought…that one damned thought… Everything went on. The sun still shined, the trees still swayed in the gentle breeze, and Adam’s coordination still lacked. When he turned from the boy to continue on his way, his foot caught in one of the many holes scattered upon the ground. Adam fell, less than gracefully, his ankle twisting and snapping; the sound resembling one made when a fragile twig breaks in half when stepped on accidently with all one’s weight. Hitting the ground palms out, a shutter ran through Adam as pain shot up his leg. Stifling a loud noise of discomfort, he lay motionless in the dirt.

“..Shit…” he grumbled to himself, almost inaudibly.

With a loud exhale, Adam sighed and slowed his hurried pace to look around at the trees and up at the cloudy blue sky. Everything else was normal… the day was bright with sun, the birds were louder than what seemed necessary, as always, the grass was green, and the trees and sky weren’t falling upon him… but Adam felt an awful change in the atmosphere as The Dreaded Thought crept into his mind. Until this time he had kept it away, pushing it down further and further, keeping it at bay. But the second he slowed his pace, the second he let his mind wander, if only slightly, the thought pounced on his strained peace and ripped it to shreds.

(I You show no interest in the girl because she’s of the opposite sex). Though to others, that thought might seem circular in reasoning; the meaning rang loud and clear to Adam. Forcing the thought away as best he could, wiping his suddenly sweating palms on his pants, Adam stopped walking and begun pacing in what seemed like an abandoned area of the wooded path, though he didn’t find it important to look up and check. His mind, now going as fast as his racing heart, tried pathetically to erase the thought from memory: (I She’s just not the girl for you. You just are not interested in her…). These forced thoughts repeated over and over in his mind as a fierce, pounding headache began to form.

(Occ: Is it alright that I post, again?)