Shield Novel

/ By ShieldHero- [+Watch]

Replies: 67 / 1 years 218 days 7 hours 38 minutes 16 seconds

Allowed Users

  1. [Allowed] -Rika


[center [i Just a journal/storage for myself that's all.]]

Reply

You don't have permission to post in this thread.

Roleplay Responses

[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hXLfYrRrYk8]


[center [+red This music is really relaxing. Used this and sleeping medication one night while my little bunny slept on my chest. I adore her so much <3. I should probably get back to roleplaying sometime. I think I'll start back on it next week. I get 5 days off next week starting this monday coming up. It'll be a good time to post.]]


[center [+red Man I got some bleh back pain so I need to get that checked out. My baby has been taking good care of her and I've been spending money taking her on dates like crazy xD. I saved a lot though so it's fine! Her family bothered her about getting a job but I told her to relax. I want her to take her time and flourish and focus on growing as a person and being the happiest person she can be. I wanna take care of her and nurture her. I was thinking if she does want a job I could try something with her I have the perfect idea. It'd involve driving around and taking orders and we'd make our OWN hours. It's something I'm learning about in my current job. We'd need to learn how to drive but it'd pay better than my current job and be more relaxing. My current job has so many benefits though so hard to choose.]]


[center [+red So far are time together has been... Wonderful and I love it. I love when she's feeling down she'll tell me how she feels. It takes her a bit but I don't mind. I love she doesn't scream or vanish off. I don't know. I always just... Tolerated certain things in past relationships. I told myself they were the growing pains of our relationship. One particular relationship that was riddled with the most yelling and abuse. One where my partner had used their age to justify the damage inflicted. That being said I too had hurt this person but I told myself those fights were just part of someone loving me. It meant "They love me if they fight this much right? Means they must care?" Turns out that does not have to be the case. Over a year together and not one argument. I mean debates but they stay calm and I've never been yelled at. Heck my only problem now a days is I won't show anger. Not to anyone, friends or family. It's not all cause this ex called me "Scary" or "Abusive" either. My fist fights in school growing up or losing my temper when someone hit me in and out of school. Or just getting angry at Alex and becoming a different person. Or how mad I got at Jill. I was the worst with Jill and I feel terrible for that...]]

[center [+red Heck I even kinda feel bad for the other one too. Wish I could say I felt bad for Alex but to be honest she had waaaay more control over that relationship than I ever did. Not saying I didn't have faults but boy I know I was also used as a backup too and than I was hidden in public.]]

[center [+red Speaking of using people terribly though it actually reminds me of the second major reason I wanted to write here. The first was to let out how happy me and Blakely were together.]]

[center [+red The second? Was to talk about FallynAngel. Just... How much I hurt this person. All this time of peace has made me self reflective. It's hard to realize how others can abuse you when you are beaten down sure I admit that. However looking back at my past stuff and going through past stories. I was an absolute villain too FallynAngel. Seriously... I know people may read this and say. "Dude for real she did blank and blank and blank." Umm.. of course she tried that hard to keep me? I keep talking about how I met her during a vulnerable point in my life so I clung onto her and even used her at some points. I did care about her.... Hard to believe as I was the worst to her. Worse to her than all my other relationships combined. She honestly had it... The worst. I never mentioned what point she had met me in. Going through a bad relationship or the end of it. (Matt) The father of her child and just... A real class act. An abusive mother a sister that I know she loves but I've seen can be harsh. A brother who makes fat jokes about her that I don't like but I'm wrong to even dislike because I've hurt her so many times myself.]]

[center [+red It'd be easy to want to reach out for somebody. It doesn't help because I was freshly 18 and she was older than me people looked at her like this bad guy for being emotional. "Act you're age" So many people here told her this and I let them just so I'd look like a victim not the bad guy. For all I lectured Lance on using that excuse... I used it myself. I'm disgusted with myself for that. Just because you are older doesn't mean you can't be broken. We can age emotionally slower when our emotional growth is stunted or damaged. Make someone live in a forest for 40 years and take them out. Will they act like a fully functioning adult? No, but it's embarrassing to admit you are stunted emotionally. It's like saying you're... behind the curve. So when Lance told me to act my age I had to just take it and not able to defend myself of fear of embarrassment. I was afraid to admit I was still behind and I was still growing. A partner should lift you up not make you feel small. Well guess what I did to Jill? Just... That I told her to act her age and she too was probably to embarrassed that her emotional growth was stunted and she was behind others around her age. She was made fun of instead of anyone... Offering her a hand to help. Pushed to the edge over and over again I can't blame her for the actions she took. Her mom locked her in a closet growing up for christ sake. For a person who's suffered so much home abuse she hardly writes about it. Guess what? She has never even ONCE used it as an excuse for her actions. Not to me or anyone on JE bullying her back than. She just accepted the taunts and pushed onward.]]


[center [+red I've called her so many terrible things.... So many awful things. I can't begin to describe how much I've wronged this person and for that? I'm truly sorry from the deepest parts of my heart I'm sorry. I hope you find happiness and the love you deserve because you deserve to be happy. It's cliche but you really are growing and I want you to know I can see that.]]

[center [+red One day if it wouldn't cause any problems with anyone. I'd like for us to be friends it'd be nice ^^. Just know you can reach out to me if you need someone to talk to. If however being around me makes you anxious. Reminds you of the abuse I inflicted? Than I understand if you keep you're distance. Honestly in the end? I just want you to choose what's best for you.]]


[center [+red Thank you so much. For everything you've done for me.]]
  Kirishima / ShieldHero- / 14d 15h 55m 18s
[center [+red My adorable Blakeachu is asleep in my bed right now. Haven't gotten much time on ES with her settling in. She's been here for about a week and my vacation has only a few days left but ya know? I've enjoyed it. This has been amazing so far and I know it will continue to be. I'll miss her when I go to work though... I love to cuddle you. Kiss you, hug you for just... Ever. Playing games together and even watching RWBY and RWBY Chibi for cuteness overload. Daaaw... I just... Love you so much. Living with you is everything I hoped for and so much more. This is my first time living with a girl/female/alien but... This is really nice with you. I was nervous but oddly... It's like living with David. Except more kisses ;3. God I love you so much and this is just... I'm so happy.]]
  Kirishima / ShieldHero- / 29d 16h 30m 52s
[center [+green I waited awhile to post this but. I am proud of you. I am sorry for the bad choices but proud of the good. I know things didn't end as well as you wanted but honestly? I've had much much worse. You've made so much progress and I can see that. Maybe one day we can be friends I think that too. You wrote you stopped stalking others so maybe you won't even see this. That's okay I do still pray for you. Hard to believe as I know I wasn't great to you either.]]


[center [+green You deserve love and happiness and I feel I genuinely hurt you and stood in the way of that. I'm sorry you had to meet me or go through that I really am. It was a good lesson for us I suppose but a hard one. It wasn't all bad like you wrote though we had good times ^^.]]


[center [+green Had I met you and talked to you like a human. A friend, not a rebound from Alex. Things would have been so different I think we would have been amazing friends. For that? I'm really sorry. I really do hope you keep on keeping on! ^^]]
  Naofumi / ShieldHero- / 81d 16h 37m 9s
Magick Archer
Fighter
Mage
Strider

Mystic Knight
Mage
Fighter
Strider


Assassin
Strider
Mage
Fighter


[h3 Growth's For Arisen]


Blakely/Magick Archer
10-100


100-200
Actually might just stay Magick Archer.
The stats are all average and can keep playing the class I'd like too.
Course could learn Sorcerer augements and a few sorcerer levels by "Mistake" wouldn't be bad honestly.
Mystic Knight wouldn't be bad either.

Shield Hero
10-100 Mystic Knight.

100-200
Fighter or Mystic Knight it's a tough one really.


Alice Vintsvent.

10-100
Fighter

100-200 Assassin.

This way she kinda becomes a weird ass Hybrid just like her father Rex Rider.

Plus... This growth I don't find too boring honestly.

[h3 Growth For Pawns]


Arhur
1-10 Fighter
10-100 Warrior
100-200 Fighter



Envy
1-10 Mage
10-100 Sorcerer
1-200 Sorcerer



Rex
1-10 Fighter
10-100 Fighter
100-200 Fighter


But he's gonna be a Strider as a support Pawn and end as a Strider.
Despite having Fighter Stats.
He gonna be a beast
  Naofumi / ShieldHero- / 101d 20h 17m 45s
[https://www.reddit.com/r/antiwork/comments/hc1oas/capitalists_hate_it_when_you_have_a_healthy/ This]
  Naofumi / ShieldHero- / 130d 6h 57m 12s
Vigor 50
Attunment: 12
Endurance: 40
Vitality: 40
STR: 40
Dex: 12
INT: 9
Faith: 9
Luck: 7

[h3 Three Tanks I found I liked]

[h3 Shield]
Vigor: 35
Attunment: 10
Endurance: 35
Vitality: 20
STR: 40
Dex: 13
INT: 10
Faith: 9
Luck: 7


[h3 Regen]
Vigor 42
Attunment: 18
Endurance: 26
Vitality: 27
STR: 13
Dex: 12
INT: 9
Faith: 35
Luck: 7


[h3 Face Tank]
Vigor 86
Attunment: 18
Endurance: 25
Vitality: 23
STR: 10
Dex: 12
INT: 10
Faith: 15
Luck: 10

[h3 Chris's Hybrid]
LV: 150
Vigor 50
Attunment: 18
Endurance: 14
Vitality: 53
STR: 40
Dex: 12
INT: 10
Faith: 35
Luck: 7

[h3 Double Check]

Level: 150

Vigor 50
Attunment: 18
Endurance: 14
Vitality: 53
STR: 40
Dex: 12
INT: 10
Faith: 35
Luck: 7

[h3 Triple CHeck]

Current
Level: 142

Current
LV: 120
Vigor: 49
Attunement: 14
End: 14
Vit: 53
Str: 45
Dex: 15
Int: 10
Faith: 10
Luck: 7


[h3 Final Outcome]
LV: 150
Vigor: 50
Attunement: 18
End: 22
Vit: 53
Str: 40
Dex: 12
Int: 10
Faith: 35
Luck: 7


OR

LV: 142
Vigor: 50
Attunement: 18
End: 14
Vit: 53
Str: 40
Dex: 12
Int: 10
Faith: 35
Luck: 7

[h3 Ring Loadout]
Sun Princess Ring
RoF+3
Havels Ring+3
Divine Protection+3

[h3 Spells]
Bountiful SunLight
Magi Shield
Blessed weapon


[h3 Armor]
Mornes Helmet
Havels Chest Piece
Catarina gauntlets.
Harald Leggings

[h3 Weapon/Shields/Chimes]

Load Out 1:
Broadsword Or Astoria Straight Sword
Havels Shield
Sorcerers staff.
Saint Tree Belvine
Cleric Sacred Chime for Blessed Weapon.

Load Out: 2
Estoc
Bridge of Glory
Sorcerers staff.
Saint Tree Belvine
Cleric Sacred Chime for Blessed Weapon.
  Naofumi / ShieldHero- / 132d 16h 29m 52s
Something I read on reddit wanted to save it here

SingularityRS
11 months ago
ยท
edited 11 months ago
Well, it is true, you're replacing one miserable life with another. It's just a matter of which one do you prefer.

With the NEET lifestyle, your misery is likely coming from the fact you have very little money to do things with, you're constantly worried what you'll do if you run out, or you're struggling to get by due to lack of money. It's the only reason why the NEET lifestyle sucks. With enough money, it becomes the best way to live. It's just most of us won't ever get enough to truly be NEET forever.

Then you have the alternative, the socially-accepted lifestyle, where you trade your most useful waking hours for cash. Your money worries may be lifted, but possibly not resolved, but it is better if you're struggling to pay bills and live properly. The only problem is, while your money issue is likely taken care of, you lose your freedom. You don't have time to live how you want. So, in the end, it cancels itself out and is just as bad, if not worse, than the life without work and constant money worries. There is a cost and that cost is massive .

It's very difficult to find that comfortable middle ground. A lot of us likely won't ever find it. It's always going to be a choice of sacrifice your time for money and be depressed because of it, or don't and be poor which also makes you depressed. Neither are 100% good or improve your quality of life as a whole.

Out of the two, NEET is better providing you're not on the verge of starvation and homelessness because at least with this lifestyle your days are mostly your own. You can do things you like and spend the days how you like without being forced to be somewhere you don't want to be. I would also say that NEET may not be preferable if you're relying on someone else to give you that lifestyle . This is because it also comes with additional worries based on the person you're relying on . It's not comforting knowing that your life is in their hands. You have to really trust and know this person. They also need to be healthy to ensure they don't die prematurely.

That all said, live how you like and don't listen to what society says you should do. Working does not equate to having a better life. People are just as miserable, depressed and suicidal doing that. People may socially accept you for working and all that, but does that stop people from being miserable? Hell no. Social acceptable does shit all for most people.

You'll only have a shot at being happy if you're doing what you wanna do, not what others tell you. People that dislike your lifestyle of freedom will always try and convince you otherwise, but that's because they don't like the fact you have the choice they don't have, so they try and get you to live that same life so they don't feel as bad. Knowing you're also in the miserable grind of pointlessness will satisfy them.

If you can escape the hellish life of grinding for money every day, take it and don't look back, providing it's not severely impacting your life.

[h3 Notes]
Stop reading people who hate capitalism Chris. Cause you realize you hate it too xD

I don't even people with good jobs.
My managers are smart cool people and make good money.
BUT
They look exhausted and dead inside 24/7 and can barely muster chuckles at times.
I wouldn't trade money for that.


M making manager at so young and B being a Manager is super nice
Told me before
That if I worked customer service than learned more I could learn how to do it.

A front end manager.
21 dollars an hour.
It'd take training and time. But I'd have to work more hours and be more available and work even harder the time I am there and take charge of others.
So in otherwords sacrifice my freedom and happiness for money.

I need to talk to my girlfriend about this.
I think I've brought up bits and pieces but yeah....
I've been thinking about this for awhile now honestly.
  Naofumi / ShieldHero- / 135d 3h 58m 18s
Cruel Fate
LV: 145
Vitality: 99
Endurance: 40
STR: 25
Skill: 12
Bloodtinge: 5
Arcane: 15

Cruel Fate
LV: 146
Vitality: 99
Endurance: 40
STR: 25
Skill: 12
Bloodtinge: 5
Arcane: 15

Cruel Fate
LV: 145
Vitality: 99
Endurance: 40
STR: 24
Skill: 12
Bloodtinge: 5
Arcane: 15

Cruel Fate
LV: 150
Vitality: 99
Endurance: 40
STR: 11
Skill: 25
Bloodtinge: 10
Arcane: 15

11 str for loch shield


And that build can be my.... ULTIMATE TANK.
Would use both shields for sure.


Remember where you fought those labrinth warriors Chris.
For your mage character.
They may be a way to get gems with secondary rally.
  Naofumi / ShieldHero- / 139d 6h 11m 19s
Just PM'd myself some notes on how to handle tonight.

So much for.
"Thank you for paying the bills Chris."
Or
"Getting the car towed/fixed with your bonus Chris"
Or paying for Phone/Hotspot.

Its just.
"Chris give me this"

Buys dinner and groceries last night?

Talks bad about me in the other room on the phone.


Thanks.
I don't really blame my brother more so the relationship he's in. I know Brandon before was always a grateful kid.
So yeah.


I'm fine just venting.

I'll keep loving him through it though thats what big brothers do.
But I will NOT give in constantly I'll draw a line. While still loving and offer support.
Emotionally and Financially.
  Naofumi / ShieldHero- / 147d 15h 32m 47s
fdsj5jba Pthumeru Ihyll X X X Radial Tempering Abyssal
zjk8q952 Pthumeru Ihyll X X X Radial Tempering Abyssal
pwmf22gu Pthumeru Ihyll X X X Radial Tempering Abyssal
  Naofumi / ShieldHero- / 148d 8h 14m 55s
Alice Defends
Need 15 Arcane.
12 Endurance.
And remaining points into STR/Skill.

Cruel Fate
LV: 10
Vitality: 10
Endurance: 12
STR: 10
Skill: 9
Bloodtinge: 5
Arcane: 14


Cruel Fate
LV: 120
Vitality: 99
Endurance: 12
STR: 25
Skill: 14
Bloodtinge: 5
Arcane: 15


OR

Cruel Fate
LV: 120
Vitality: 97
Endurance: 25
STR: 16
Skill: 12
Bloodtinge: 5
Arcane: 15


OR

LV 122

Cruel Fate
LV: 120
Vitality: 99
Endurance: 25
STR: 16
Skill: 12
Bloodtinge: 5
Arcane: 15


Endurance: 25
Is exactly enough for FIVE greatsword swings.
And exactly enough for TEN 1 handed swings.


Not sure if the two levels will make a huge difference or not.
  Naofumi / ShieldHero- / 154d 11h 20m 37s
Alice Defends
Need 15 Arcane.
12 Endurance.
And remaining points into STR/Skill.

Cruel Fate
LV: 10
Vitality: 10
Endurance: 12
STR: 10
Skill: 9
Bloodtinge: 5
Arcane: 14


Cruel Fate
LV: 120
Vitality: 99
Endurance: 12
STR: 25
Skill: 14
Bloodtinge: 5
Arcane: 15


OR

Cruel Fate
LV: 120
Vitality: 97
Endurance: 25
STR: 16
Skill: 12
Bloodtinge: 5
Arcane: 15


OR

LV 122

Cruel Fate
LV: 120
Vitality: 99
Endurance: 25
STR: 16
Skill: 12
Bloodtinge: 5
Arcane: 15


Endurance: 25
Is exactly enough for FIVE greatsword swings.
And exactly enough for TEN 1 handed swings.


Not sure if the two levels will make a huge difference or not.
  Naofumi / ShieldHero- / 154d 11h 21m 17s
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AEZ0-A8bEVk]
[youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JiP_pWTtNaY&t=521s]
Woke up to Lucy tryng to take my spot and my computer being a doodoo head xD

Not why I decided to post here though.
Sorry I was exhausted from work yesterday. I know you said I shouldn't apologize but I felt I wasn't their mentally.
I know I keep saying this but I shouldn't volunteer so much to do the physical parts of other peoples jobs.
I do it cause I can listen to music outside or call you. If I do it I could take it slower but I don't and I gotta be careful legs are still in so much pain.


But to the point now huh? I wanted to say so much and ask so much but I didn't know where to start or lead to.
I... Well for starters good morning I love you so much.
You are the sun to my earth.
The ocean to my beach. Shining down on me crashing back and forth.
I know that sounds flimsy or just hopelessly romantic but I feel it's accurate.
Not that you are a back and forth person though it isn't my intent in saying.
Actually if anything you are the most consistent person I've ever met.
Everyday I know I can wake up with you there.
I suppose maybe it applies more to mood swings? Hmm... No not even than your moods are tied to things happening and that is reasonable.
Period
Family Issues
I want you to give me you're area/address

Not so I can mail you gifts I know you complain on that xD
But because I wanna help plan a hotel out and stuff for us.
Making room reservations.
I've got the money now we just gotta make the plans.

I'm excited! I'm also... Side tracked xD
I'm here for you.
I'm sorry I was a zombie and didn't ask more questions.

I was frustrated and not at you so I chose to be quiet a lot.
I've been an a relationship where taking anger and stress out on each other was the norm.
I haven't thought about that in some time.
I suppose it's done slightly more damage than I thought I was sure I got out unscathed part of my hero complex I feel I'm impervious to all kinds of damage.

I'm afraid to show anger.
I was shocked when you said.
"Chris sometimes you should pressure me for answers"
But... I when I think of being dominant or forceful.

I remember pressuring Abby to tell me anything and she'd go.
"I don't wanna talk about it"
And start saying
"Whatever"
In the most typical teenager sass you could think of ya know?
It'd lead to her yelling of course and me yelling back.
Our default emotions were turned on and angry sometimes at the same time.
How does that work? Looking back? I don't know.
I think it only lasted because she was desperate to have a crutch in her life and I was desperate to save someone who needed it.
It was moronic on both halves not just her own.


That being said it isn't fair to you I can't express negative emotions.
It's funny you even want to see them huh?
Well I'm still never gonna let you see me angry! Not cause we aren't close but because Idk... I love you.
I'm afraid to put you through that cause I know it's not fun.

I understand and relate with you're recoiling into video games for a bit.
I support you in however you want to cope because I love you. That was another issue wasn't it?
We both had done that in the past causing problems for our others.

You reach out to me and understand. You love me so strongly.
I feel you are too good for me.


I adore you gorgeous.
And I'm gonna PM you a few things
But just.. I love you.
I LOVE YOU
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH.

You mean the world to me.
Last night I know we didn't say much..
I know we were grumpy with our days but even in those moments.
I mean yeah I felt powerless to help you sure but... I felt I'm at home.
With you.
I'm where I'm meant to belong.

I love you with all of my heart.
I wanna say more and I will as I wake up.

Mwah! I love you <3
  Naofumi / ShieldHero- / 155d 15h 3m 24s
Lone Survivor
VS
Waste of skin
VS
Violent Past
VS
Miltary Vet


Lone Survivor
LV: 10
Vit: 14
Endurance: 11
STR: 11
Skill" 10
Bloodtinge: 7
Arcane: 7

Lone Survivor at
LV: 49
Vit: 30
Endurance: 12
STR: 30
Skill" 13
Bloodtinge: 7
Arcane: 7

Waste of Skin
LV: 51
VIT: 30
Endurance: 12
STR: 30
Skill: 13
Bloodtinge: 7
Arcane: 9

Violent Past:
LV: 48
Vit: 30
End: 12
STR: 30
Skill: 13
Bloodtinge: 6
Arcane: 7


Military Vet:
LV: 48
Vit: 30
Endurance: 12
STR: 30
Skill: 13
Bloodtinge: 7
Arcane: 6

Violent Past wins

Violent Past:
LV: 47
Vit: 30
End: 12
STR: 30
Skill: 12
Bloodtinge: 6
Arcane: 7
  Naofumi / ShieldHero- / 158d 15h 48m 29s
I'm a tad late, but with the regular burial blade you can get 3 madman temperings with 21% tempering, +6.3% rally. xbzefy98 for radials and pw8ykpcr for waning
  Naofumi / ShieldHero- / 162d 47s
12345

All posts are either in parody or to be taken as literature. This is a roleplay site. Sexual content is forbidden.

Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our
Privacy Policy, Terms of Service and Use, User Agreement, and Legal.
Roleplay
12345