The Lonely Hearts Club

/ By TheHoe [+Watch]

Replies: 78 / 122 days 4 hours 7 minutes 24 seconds

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[youtube https://youtu.be/CEm2AVUJnKc]
bleh bored and writers block is kicking my booty. Send help.
  Allistor / Hanahaki- / 4d 18h 28m 10s
wow didnt think id cry this much watching Coco but it was such a great movie.
  Allistor / Hanahaki- / 18d 4h 52m 48s
[youtube https://youtu.be/kxUdftDwoFw]
Dont you just love it when you find the perfect song that describes your feelings? Ahhh im so petty.
  Allistor / Hanahaki- / 20d 4h 30m 16s
Uhg i have done nothing since i graduated and it feels so weird. Like no friends have contacted me ive just been chilling. Im giving myself a week to chill sure but it feels so weird. I need to get a job. Lmao imma do great amiright? Uhg im on a roller coaser that only goes up my friend
  Allistor / Hanahaki- / 21d 11h 34m 58s
Youd be so proud of me. At least youd act like it. Id be so happy and wed pretend you were gonna make the night all about me. Your mom would tell me how proud she is. Its so sureal. I dont know why i dont rfeel whole sometimes. Im mostly happy but you filled up this little empty part of me and now that you are gone....i dont know .Its silly and im happy im not with you because you were not right for me but idk. I D K its weird
  Hanahaki- / 24d 20h 24m 52s
Thourogly shook. Going to a pride event. Its gonna be litty spagitty. Yeet. Ii hate myself. OKAYgOoDbYe
  Allistor / Hanahaki- / 30d 17h 58m 9s
Ah love. Its a wonderful thing isnt it?
Wonderful but terrible. Im begining to feel like ill never find somone who really loves me. Its always going wrong. My heart is so used to being broken by people that its not going to let me fall for somone withi my grasp. Of course i fall for my best friend. Of course im not the kind of boy they are into. Of course of course of course. Why must my heart do this to me. I feel like bursting
  Allistor / Hanahaki- / 39d 13h 13m 1s
[youtube https://youtu.be/M73x3O7dhmg]
I love this so mucch.
  Allistor / Patchwork / 47d 11h 4m 11s
Ah how wonderful this school week will be. No school the first two days, senior skip day Wednesday, and one of the remaining days is field day. It will be such an easy week. I'm ready for this.
  Elliot / Patchwork / 49d 10h 17m 33s
Just want this all to be over. I don't care about it anymore but I care about what people think of me. It's nasty habit I caught somewhere around the time I had to be the new kid. I had to please everyone, even if they didn't matter to me. Even if I hated those people more than anything in the world. I had to not be annoying. I had to make sure my name wasn't a bad one. I hate this about myself. I hate that even though there are maybe three people on this website I actually care about I still hate seeing the way people perceive me. I wish I could take it all back. I wish I could go back in time to the last day of my freshman year and tell myself how in the end it would cause nothing but trouble. Not to say there weren't times where I was the happiest I've ever been. I remember opening up that big package from mom with everyone. I was having so much fun. My rooms such a disaster I can't find everything she sent me, and even if I could I don't have your address to send it all back. My mom says gifts are gifts and I don't have to return anything but it just feels wrong. I know it's all my stuff now because your mom gave it to me but I feel dirty taking it. After everything that went down. After all the lies and cheating from both sides. We don't deserve gifts from each other. If I had sent the pictures I had drawn and the painting I made you...well I'd be devastated. You would probably destroy them in a fit of break up induced rage. All the hard work I put into them if someone was gonna destroy it all it would be me. And I did. I'm sorry. I wish I could send it all back to you but truth be told I don't even remember half the stuff you sent.
This got rambly but that's what I made this journal for. I am over the breakup. I don't love you anymore and I don't hate you either. But I spent so much time thinking of you 24/7 you aren't gonna leave my mind just yet. I hate what you did. I hate what I did. I hate what happened, but not you. And not her. Not any of the hers I hated. I just want to forget it all. I just want to start over. I can't say I won't post about you again but I'm not trying to be malicious when I do. I'm trying to vent. I'd say ignore it because who cares what all the assholes on here think but I obviously can't say that without practicing what I preach.
I am gonna start over. With the new school and the new life I'll be able to start over well. I just wish I could give myself closure. Real closure. Maybe when I graduate it'll shut the door on that part of my life and I can open the next chapter. I think I'll be okay.
And it's far too late for me to be writing this ugh fb rambles. Goodnight journal and snoopers.
  Elliot / Patchwork / 50d 4h 27m 25s
Senior trip is gonna be awesome. I'm so excited.
  Elliot / Patchwork / 53d 2h 10m 23s
Listening to deh is an experience. It's very sad but such a wonderful soundtrack. It is oddly calming to me. It makes me feel better too. I forgot just how great it is to be honest. I'm glad I listened to it again.

I'm so saddddd. Two more days this shop cycle then we go back to the last academic cycle. We have altogether only six more days of shop before we all graduate. It's so sad. I'm gonna miss it. As much as I hated it I also loved it. We all laughed so much. We were a big shop family. I'm gonna miss these guys.
  Elliot / Patchwork / 55d 33m 3s
Contrary to popular belief my friend, I don't want to date. Not now at least. We are so young. We are going off to college. We have a whole life ahead of us. Let's forget about all that and just focus on what's important: getting our shut together. You and I know we are both so fucked up right now we need to just check ourselves. Figure out what's important to us. I don't want to date anyone. Sure love comes along in mysterious ways and I'm gonna fall a bazillion before I find the one but I believe what you put out to the universe you get back, and I'm trying to put out as much love and positivity as I possibly can. I know my future is bright. I'm so excited to see where I go.

Also a side note this is a journal to throw out things I'm thinking. It's usually just jumbled up random shit that I want to say. I try to not use names so as to not start drama but I understand that sometimes it's obvious. Again this is MY journal. It is for ME to let out thoughts. If you don't like what you are reading then just don't read it. I'm no going to stop writing what I feel,and in no way am I saying that you shouldn't, but at the same time I'd rather if you know personal information about me that you don't share it so openly. People don't need to know my kinks, or the desperate things I did.
  Elliot / Patchwork / 56d 2m 27s
My stop got invaded. I liked being alone in the morning now there are so many people. I can't handle it. Why.
  Elliot / Patchwork / 57d 40m 11s
Ive been free of you for over 100 days....wow....its just crazy how much better ive gotten in such a short time. I didnt think that i could do it. I didnt think i could stay away from you. Your pull was to strong. You made me think i needed you, like i couldnt live without you. I dont need you. Im living just fine without you. Im so proud of myself for getting out of a bad sitation. For doing something for myself. I am improving my life for me. Thats a big step.
  Allistor / Patchwork / 57d 20h 8m 20s
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