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It surprisingly wasn't bad, a sweet little kiss, and he wasn't that bad at it. She stepped back after a moment giving him a soft smile. "I'm not worried about that anymore. I was hit by a nasty curse and I'm pretty lucky. From here nothing can stop me. Though the hairdo of the 80's are terrifying..."
She gave a small chuckle. She could help him and possibly not catch feelings. She was more than happy to be a little sparrow, which was her patronas.
Remus sat down on the chair, a long tear down the side. He traced it before looking back to her. "No, Blakely, there isn't. Once your marked and a part of a creature you can't get a ministry job or any other job. I wanted to come here and prove myself, I did. But it's difficult from here...I can't change the past but maybe I can help in the future."
She did seem to want more in some way and it wasn't what he could give but wanted to.
Severus would have never tbought of kissing anyone other than Lily. It had been something he had wanted for a while, but meeting Willow had changed something in him. And he could only guess that maybe it was for the better too. The boy didn't want to be that lonely and bitter man he had seen due to the neckace and its flash forwards. He wanted to be able to live and to learn. Wanted to experience things he never had. Even if that meant with someone new.
Her words stung because he did know what it was like. To be happy for someone you had been close with but hurt at the same time. To be envious and to want what they had. "There is still time..." The boy found himself whispering just before the quick and chaste kiss. It had been soft, or rather her lips had been. And he had managed to kiss her back as quickly. Not at all the awkward feeling he would have thought.
A sad smile traced the girl's lips. [b "So this was why you had said back at Christmas... we all have our demons to face. That some days they are easier to handle than on other days."] Her words were soft and thoughtful as they were spoken.
Her hand gently squeezed his as she slowly looked up. Comforting in their way, they also hurt. [b "You've become very dear to me and I really am happy we became friends..
Yes I do know that...but it won't always be that way....I mean there are options and some willing to take the chance."] She was referring to more than one thing in her words.
Willow hadn't kissed a friend before. It was strangers, or quittance, never friends. It was an odd thought because floating around was the older, bat image. Thinking on Brian and Blakely hurt more than she intended, swallowing that gulp she nodded. "I was happy that they made each other so happy but in the same moment I wanted that. I'm not so sure now if I want that but I think I have time."
A second chance. The answer half surprised her. She thought on this for a moment before stepping a little closer and leaned up . Pressing her lips against his, she was surprised that it felt pretty comfortable. Still, it was chaste and she only intended on it being short.
Of course she knew, Remus thought with both relief and concern. No wonder she had been trying to press the fact that he was good. "It's not really brave, it's just...you need to do what you need to do...some days it's exhausting and I want to give it all up but I know I can't. It's just a larger burden."
He took her hand and smiled. "You've been a good friend, and I'm happy to be that. You must know that there are laws against lycanthropes and any creature like that everywhere for jobs and all that."
The girl had known about him being a werewolf. Everyone after he had left at the end of the year he left had known because Snape had "let it slip". And it had been sad seeing him go because in her opinion he had been the one who had cared the most for the students and who had taught them the most. But she had never known how or why he had become what he was. That had always made her curious but she had never had the courage to ask because that wasn't something that you openly asked someone. And even now she could tell him telling her was hard.
[b "I did kind of figure about you being a werewolf..the change in personality during the full moon...But you're incredibly brave in being able to tell me this..and for learning to deal with this."] Her words were careful and gentle as she spoke them. This time she was trying not to let too much slip. And not tell him that she had been starting to fall. They kind of had that conversation before and it had hurt more than she had thought it would have.
"You mean you're happy for them but feel envious in a way? And in a strange sense you want what they've got?" The boy was sure that was what the girl was referring to. But still it at least in his own mind made sense to say it out loud. It was also how he felt too. He hated himself for it, but he could not help it either.
Her next words really did take him aback and his eyes shot to the girl. Did she really intend to be his first kiss? The thought was strange but not in a terrifying way but in an almost pleasant one. After all, Willow had become a friend and he was starting to have feelings for her. "I...yeah it would be nice to know what it's like." But those were the only words he could say because he was still really bad in getting out his thoughts were emotions and intimacy were concerned.
"It-it's called that because of what I am..." Remus stuttered with that starting before looking at anywhere but her. "My father insulted Frenrir Greyback a while back, and Frenir got his revenge by attacking me. He tried to stop it but it was too late. Dumbledore accepted me to school saying no one should not have an education. So we made rumors this place was haunted and they hear me at night and the Whomping Willow."
He still wasn't ashamed of what he was. That wasn't clear it was just different. "I...don't mind...I just know that my options are limited in career and how I could support anyone."
It was not good to think of the future. Willow had even snogged, it wasn't often, but she wasn't selective but not too open. It was a strange combination with her. Looking to him she looked thoughtful for a moment. "You know, what you feel when you see them is normal. I remember feeling that with Brian and Blakely. Not that I was into him that way, just was the third wheel to a beautiful love story."
She rubbed her neck awkwardly at the memory before the idea that she should kiss him. That was a bit weird though, wasn't it? She didn't know. "I'd be willing. Can't leave these years without some experiences."
The butterbeer and even being around with the small group wasn't as horrid as he had thought it would be. Strange but it was still more welcoming than being alone. And he had actually spoken with Remus, which he had promised Willow that he would. It had even seemed the other boy had been as thrown off as he had been at the beginning.
As the afternoon slowly wore on, the others slowly went their own way. Lily and James had straggled behind and stopped to kiss and Blakely and Remus had wandered towards the Shrieking Shack. Which he wondered why they would head their of all the places that they could have chosen.
His attention was soon on Lily and James and he couldn't help a soft sigh. Never had he been kissed or felt those sort of feelings. Bittersweet in it's way. But he was drawn from his thoughts when he heard Willow's words and flushed a bright red as his attention was drawn to the blonde at his side. It was awkward to say the least. Was it that obvious? "No....never...None of it but I have seen it. And well always wondered what it could be like." His voice and words were low as he was embarrassed to admit it.
The boy had no idea where she was going with her question or words.
The afternoon had been a nice one and one she could say she was content with. She had her bestfriend back and everyone seemed to be getting along for the time being. Even the butterbeer seemed to taste better, which was saying something because she loved the taste of it normally as it was. And the conversations among the small group was nice, though still awkward. Almost did she picture it to be like a family, a dysfunctional one but still a family.
By the time she and Remus left the others, Blakely couldn't help a soft laugh. [b "I almost thought that you had forgotten."] The girl said, teasing the boy gently. She couldn't help it as it seemed a weight had been lifted from her shoulders.
As the door was opened by Remus, the girl did slowly look inside and step inside. The place didn't look anything like she would have thought. Actually lovely if she were honest. [b "It is really nice..much different than I would have expected.. So..why does it have its name?"]
Butterbeer never tasted as good as it did then. There was the cold air that was giving signs of giving way to spring. They had to bring together more tables but it felt warm and relaxed, she was very content with this. After the drinks, they walked around eventually partially going their own ways.
Remus and Blakely went their own way, and the others straggled behind. When seeing James and Lily started with the kissing. It was sweet, she looked to Severus wondering what he was thinking.
Walking by him she gave a curious look. "Severus, so far have you...kissed or even snogged here?" That question just came out and it was more awkward coming out than intended. She would owe Sirius some time after this, but she needed to get her footing.
Remus was taken back by Severus talking to him. It was awkward but surprisingly it wasn't awful, just strange for both of them. The Butterbeer was good, and conversation floated around. It was actually quite comfortable.
"I'm here to keep my end of the bargain," Remus said before nodding in the direction of the shack. It would be a very nice place if they didn't keep it in that condition, but it was for good reasons.
Opening the door he glanced around, not used to seeing it normal. Mostly it was when the night was over. "It's really just a normal house.Quite nice really."
Both of them had been slow in telling the other the truth. The girls had both been trying to spare the other more grief, but in the end had been slowly tearing themselves apart. So similar and so different in the ways they handled things. And that thought made her think back to what Remus had said. "Let her come to you and tell you when she's ready. And talk to her..."
A sad smile came to her lips. [b "Hufflepuffs are the worst when it comes to things like that..And we all were children who grew up. This shouldn't have to happen to anyone else. You know you're my best friend and I love you like a sister as well... I always have, Willow. And yes...I still want to help and to try and give them a fighting chance. They deserve one."]
The words were spoken quietly as she looked back to the generation before their own. Both of them wanted to help, but it was a matter of how now.
[b "Though I have to ask...do you notice how both Severus and Sirius act with you? They both have feelings for you..."] Blakely said quietly as she pulled her eyes back to her cousin amd gave a soft look.
"Well, there was not an insult or a glare...so I'd say so...there may be hope to save them. And if we can prevent that war then the Brian's won't die, and kids like us won't have to do this. You were right in the first place, I'm sorry," Willow moved forward to hug Blakely. "I...am sorry for not telling you..."
It had been months and it had taken her this long, she just had been slow. "That's the issue with those damn Hufflepuffs, he'd sacrifice himself for a fly. It's not your fault, they trained for years and we were just kids...I love you like a sister. Do you still want to try and change the world?"
Looking to those group of people, those who will die, she knew that she had to.
[b "You mean the words he spoke when he was talking to you that night in explaining this.. It was him but not him? Like he was slowly changing from the man we had known before?"] The girl offered, her eyes slowly following Willow's to their new friends and the 'ghosts' they had began to know as people. And how they had been before everything had began.
A soft sigh slipped her lips and she found herself nodding. [b "So to help.... we stay and live this life as if it was meant to be ours too.. Get to know them and slowly help. You're not alone in this. I promise, Willow."] Blakely said softly and then fell silent to listen to the tale her cousin had to tell and why she was so hauntef by what had happened.
Almost instantly did the strawberry blonde hug the blonde girl. [b "Willow...I am so sorry.. I wish I would have known.. I mean I knew you were off but not why.. I had just thought it was the affects of the war and us losing Brian."] She whispered and after a few moments pulled back, biting her lip.
[b "You're not the only one who got someone unintentionally killed...I...Brian had died to save me that night. A spell came my way that I wasn't quick enough to deflect...and he..."] The other girl had to know.
That night still did haunt her all the while giving her some strange rejuvenation. Thinking on that night she looked to the trees, and the small group of friends before looking back to Blakely. "It was all for love, Blakely...everything...even the words of love being forever...though I don't think it was all him, it was weird."
She gave a nod in response. "I don't know...but it's going to take years to do this...we might have to stay. I promised I'd tell you what really happened."
She took a breath before looking away from her cousin. "There was a fourth year girl in my house named Nelly. She was already weak of nerves, and it was hard on the nerves there. Threats everyday, name calling, it was demeaning in every way. Snape saved us from being hurt though. Anyway...
"One night we was going to get word from someone's uncle in the department and we needed to get to the Divination Tower. Nelly wanted to come with us, we knew we shouldn't have her come, but we did let her. Close to the tower, there was three Death Eaters coming by and..."
She swallowed the lump in her throat. "She was going to scream and completely freak out...and if that happened we'd all get horrible fates. I had to use a powerful spell on her to bind her and silence her. She wasn't the same after that. At the battle I heard her screaming, and went to help her and she wasn't even defending herself. She was killed right before my eyes, and it was my fault for breaking her..."
She took a shuddering breath and looked to her with wide eyes. "I'm sorry I couldn't tell you. You were grieving over Brian and I...helped kill an innocent girl..."
Blakely was silent as Willow spoke and explained it all. Honestly she had begun to expect that the necklaces had not been from Brian afterall, but the fact that it had been Snape literally had her mind reeling. She hadn't particularly liked the man when they had been in school but had been willing to believe that there had been some good in him. And from what she was told all of that seemed to be very much the case. And it saddened her more to think of the fate that awaited all of them.
[b "So he wants us to change the past here and try and make sure our future never happens the way it does... And believes that in part to stop it we first have to stop him becoming a Death Eater? I can try and help with that..."] It had taken a few moments but her head had finally wrapped around it.
She then looked down and kicked the snow with the toe of her boots. [b "Once we do what he wants...will the necklaces take us home? I mean take us back to the future?"] The girl asked. Blakely hadn't told Willow but she eas starting to fall for the younger Remus with the more time she spent with him. And she hated herself for it because it made her feel even guiltier about Brian. Like she was betraying him.
There was so much to be said and so little time. What had happened, what she had done, and so much more. Giving a small breath, she took Blakely to a more remote spot before giving a sigh. "I'm sorry, I acted that way...there's something I haven't told you...but I will in a second though it's really difficult to say."
Looking back to Severus she looked to Blakely. Willow explained the visit with Snape, what he said, and given her to explain the timeline. She had already studied it ten times over. She took a small breath. "Snape did everything because he loved Lily. He indirectly asked that we stop him from being a Death Eater...can you help me with that? I care about him..all of them..."
Finally she took a breath before looking softer. "I want to help."
Blakely gave Willow a weak smile when the girl had approached and gave a small smile of her own. [b "I think you're right. Remus already told me that Lily threatened to drag the two of us together and make us. Apparently she's gotten tired of watching us both be kind of broody."] The girl said as she took off one of her gloves and brushed her hair back behind her ear to look at Severus who was still a few steps behind her cousin. The poor boy looked a little nervous.
Once more a small smile came to her lips and she nodded. [b "I think this time the two of them will be better. Especially when Remus had agreed to help us get Sirius and James agreeing to Christmas. And it would be good for the both of them to branch out a bit..."] The words she spoke were thoughtful as she held her hand out to Willow, giving the other a gentle tug. Them talking would be good and so would getting a little away from the boys.
That did sound like something they would do, It would be difficult to do, Willow would try to at least get them to talk without wanting to gauge each others eyes out. "Blakely will be able to help more in that department. Really, I'd ask her for help."
Thinking on that year she gave a broad smile. "It's really impressive since he was six foot and a Beater. No, it was sort of necessary. It was the year that he came to Hogwarts. Blakely thought he was the sun and moon and still does."
She gestured to Remus, from what Snape had told her originally it must have been the return of the greatest tormentors ever.
Once they were at Hogsmede, she approached Blakely, and flashed a small smile. "They won't let us have fun until we talk, not that we truly need to. Okay, so we do...so should we talk so we can get a butterbeer? Remus won't be alone, I convinced Severus to try to talk to Remus."
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