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[size10 I'm going to take a two day break. I need it. I study nonstop. I just hope it worked out, I'm excited to see my grade, I know it can't be that bad, so...
Crossing my fingers.
Also Rengoku gave me a starbucks gift card ;o;
FNVNVFJVNJ why are my friends so fucking great!!!
They care so much, I love them.]
[center [pic https://66.media.tumblr.com/deaa71b225f49a8c9d03c20c5d6d2cd9/tumblr_pxrh6tExn01s3vhwko1_400.png]]
[center [size10 I shouldn't be surprised.
I won't say anything.
None of my business.
There is no cheat codes
or pink prints of me.
Anything else is a downgrade.]]
Daisy might be dying...
I woke up and was immediately worried when I saw her laying down beside my legs...
She looked so.. sad?
She seemed off..
I tried not to cry so I could look brave for her.
I ended up crying.
She is alive, I don’t know if she is in pain but seems off.
All I could do is call her a good girl..
Because if she is leaving us soon, I want her to know she has been the best good girl there ever was...
And if it is her time, I’m going to cry and—
I’ll never stop crying.
[size10 By the end of this all, I'll be stronger.
I'm in immense pain, rare for my heart to not be aching.
It's only human of me to be this weak.
Right now I feel at peace, I think I've come to terms with it all.]
[size10 I try to have a nice conversation with family. I sit at the table to eat lunch with everyone, I bring up topics and then I get humiliated.
Why are you guys so damn mean?
I try my hardest to be confident and build up my self-esteem..
Just so you guys can spit on it?
Judge me, make fun of me.
The only thing you people are good at.]
[size10 Nothing good comes easy.
Nothing good comes easy.
Just gotta keep going..
I wanna be successful, I want to be proud.
I want to be the rich "man" parents often tell their daughters to marry.
Marry someone for wealth? not a bad idea but no thanks.
I want my own money and power.
I will be proud, so long as I keep going.]
[size10 Had a bad day but stayed up all night watching anime and drowned in beautiful fan art, It's rare I get overwhelmed with this much art.
Despite my emotions being everywhere.. I'm glad I'm an emotional turmoil with my shit together. Tomorrow is another study day.. I have a lot to memorize.
I'm scared to have ships in this show, it's like AOT, no one is safe. I'm already leaning towards one and ughhh. Naruto's ending has traumatized me. I really should stray from ships. It is really sad to see how bad Naruto is in comparison to these new animes coming out, lol.]
[center [pic https://66.media.tumblr.com/96b238eb38c8ab4abc5bd6ef0afa07d8/tumblr_pw96xzbN4V1xlv8m3o2_540.gif] [pic https://66.media.tumblr.com/50ef145a57d809767e1540ca0491a89b/tumblr_pw96xzbN4V1xlv8m3o1_540.gif][pic https://66.media.tumblr.com/06fd37756239299f0f261d0bdf44943c/tumblr_pw96xzbN4V1xlv8m3o3_540.gif]]
[size10 You makes me feel so good and right...
all the rights things.. ♡]
[size10 I shouldn't be so angry like that..
I forgive her, that is all I could say.
Moving on though, I am excited to get my new desk soon.
I need a new study space so...
Man, I really don't feel good tonight. ]
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[size10 Our love... has run so deep, so long.. ahh, I think we're on some soul mate vibe, I've known from the beginning, since I met you. We clicked right away.. I became addicted to you so fast. I was able to pick up the pieces of myself back then and you were there to help me, you never tried to take credit for it either.. that is something I love about you-- you believe in me. All you did was love me.
I think it is safe to say that I'm [i madly and deeply in love with you]. It has been safe to admit it for a long time now. I never thought I could love someone this much, never thought I'd be so madly in love, never thought it was possible to love this much. My mom said something I never thought I'd hear her say. Basically though.. she told me to not ever lose you, she knows you're good for me. I can't help but to cry as I type this up-- you know I'm a cry baby. I may be a clap back queen and am strong but.. ahhh, I happy cry sometimes. I'm so grateful that I have the ability to happy cry. I'm grateful to be able to love this much-- it's scary but also I'm still grateful no matter what.
You're so good to me..
You really are..
You're too good to me--
I CAN'T STOP CRYING!!!!!
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, YOU STUPID JERK!!!!
fnvkvnfkvnfk .. i love you... i love you.. my everything ...
Thank you for loving me.. for deserving me and being so so good to me always.. ♡]
[size10 I love you so much~
I was pretty angry over a nightmare..
So stupid of me~
I'm so grateful for you, I love you so much..
so, so, so, so, so much~
Mi amor... ]
A cheater will never tell the truth.
They never will tell the truth until they're sorry they got caught.
Until they get caught.
Too many stories of cheaters recently..
That wasn't a dream.. it was a nightmare...
I felt my sanity slipping.. I felt like dying.
I have never woke so terrified before, every second and minute felt so real. The pain was.. unreal.
I have told you this before in the past.
I will never, never, never, never, EVER. fight for you.
I will never fight another for you. I will NEVER.
I don't believe in fighting for love like that-- that isn't love.
I will never compete with another, the moment I'm suspicious, I will leave-- so quickly, you wouldn't see it coming. Like in my dream, first I'd beat the shit out of you.
I think... I have always been afraid.
Even now, I'm scared.
Can you blame me? I've been cheated on before..
Obviously... obviously-- somewhere deep inside, I'm scared-- terrified.
It sounds silly because I can't imagine you cheating...
But my mom has always told me not to be a fool.
My mom has always warned me, since I was a child.
Trust no one.
Trust no one.
Not even you.
Yet here I am.. trusting you.
But it was just a nightmare.. right?
[size10 I said my father ain't no pimp but he taught me the pimp way
Can't no nigga disrespect you, keep these hoes up in they place
You know you doing something right when they love you out of hate
You see I read between the lines, I know yo' praise was really shade, nigga ~]
[size10 I've been googling for like a month or something to find the new code geass movie online but I see it is nowhere to be found, bae says it is too soon which I guess is true but... sigh, salt. I'll keep watching my other anime and stranger things, grey's anatomy, whatever keeps me entertained while I'm on break.
I miss Teme already, wasn't long enough.
I'm a little stressed.. my sister worries me.
I feel like she isn't lying.. maybe her room really is haunted.
Paranormal stuff scares me so.. I'm not too useful here, I can only let her sleep with me when it really scares her.
I hope they do something about it soon.. if it really is haunted.
I think I am going to Canada in the winter after all.
I already miss mi amor :(
I'll try my best to keep being optimistic though.
Positive energy always.
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