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[size10 OKay buzzed thoughts:
Elizabeth and Darcy....
Rey and Ben/Kylo Ren ....
[size10 I need to find some Battlefront friends, I’m getting way better at the game. I have some hilarious clips from me getting my ass whooped to me whooping ass. Today I saw my improvement. Also roleplaying with other Star War characters is making me so happy. Mando and Baby Yoda melt my heart and it will melt my Rey’s heart too fjfnfknf
Though I’ve been having fun, I need to prioritize my school work. Semester is back up and I procrastinated all weekend. I really need to get my shit together tomorrow and Tuesday.
I also spent a lot of my time dancing.
Dancing should just be my exercise routine tbh.
I clearly like twerking too much so LOL but man..
Also had fun with a certain someone..
Which was... really nice.
So I enjoyed my weekend.
Speaking of enjoying.. I didn’t watch the game tonight but I was so proud of Shakira and JLO which is the only thing I watched, my Latina Queens really did that. Such a proud night for Latino/Latinx people everywhere. I got like chills, goosebumps with just how amazing it was.. to see two Latina woman on live television for EVERYONE to see. I’m so proud. LATINO GANG!
Shit I typed a lot..
This wine is gross.
[center [pic https://i.pinimg.com/originals/20/4d/4f/204d4f53f9df5f7d257a74eb8d676e42.gif]]
[size10 Damn.. this really hurts. If the circumstances were different, would you leave him? I know right now it feels like you're trapped and maybe even he feels the same way. This is where the guilt kicks in because.. I can't give you options. I know it isn't my responsibility.. but I know you both resent me because I can't give a way out. Not yet, anyway.
This just scares me more, you know? Most of my life I've always felt like.. I'm not fit for marriage. Being in my 20's... is weird. I'm lost. There was a time I thought I knew what I wanted. There was a time I actually WANTED to get married.. a time I was so optimistic about it. A time I really embraced the idea.
Now a little further up..
I'm back to that mentality-- actually..
Maybe it's worse because I'm convinced I'll never be fulfilled in that area.
But that area is the least important in my life.
What matters is I love myself, family, health and career.
Aha, I'm lost.
I'm a little scared too.
Life is so unpredictable.
I wish that..
for once I'd be pleasantly surprised.
But instead.. I get to find out about unpleasant things. That is all I could say... I'm always right-- I don't want to be. I don't like being right, not about these things. I'm disappointed, to say the least.
[size10 That's on my mama, yeah that's on the hood
You don't want no problems, I wish a bitch would
Tryna come between us, it won't end up good
You know I love you like no one else could
I'd go to hell and back for you
Bend over backwards, acrobats for you
Yeah, I'd go up to bat for you
Even when shit lookin' bad for you
I been waiting so long for a love like this
It's a feeling so strong I don't wanna resist
Like you can't do no wrong, got me losin' my shit
Gotta loosen my grip, no
Fuck that my baby you all mine
Greatest of all time
You better tell them hoes, "Fall in line"
I do not play about mine.
Summer Walker is my shit, god, I never get tired of listening to her songs..
And this Jhene Aiko verse is everything!!
[size10 I try to be diverse with the type of characters I roleplay but ... I clearly like to portray a certain type. Some of these characters hit close. It isn't that deep but it's also like...
[i I feel that].
Aside from that..
It's late at night and I'm just in my head, I guess.
I'm just thinking that.. I'm grateful for her. We're best friends but we're clearly complicated. From the moment we met, we were just [i something else] and only [i we] understand it. Six years of our journey heading towards seven, right? I think a lot about it. No matter what we are.. I know this for sure; you know my soul and I know yours.
I truly believe [i we were meant to meet]. I don't know what we are meant to be but I know we needed to meet. I'm grateful, grateful that.. we met. I know you... and you know me.
No matter who I meet... they will never know me as well as you do.
I'm happy that there is someone on earth who I can connect to so deeply.
We dated, yeah but this-- whatever we have --- isn't common. This is strange almost.
I feel insanely lucky.
Even if you fall completely out of love with me one day..
when you do..
when you finally love someone else..
I'll feel lucky still, grateful still that we met.
I'm convinced that if I do end up with someone else.. aha, I doubt they'd be on some... soul level shit with me.
We're just.. i don't know what the hell is with us????
We're weirdos.. this is weird. No, just.. our bond is truly extraordinary. I can't even begin to explain it to someone.. nobody would get it.
I'm just glad I got to experience it once in my life time.
Because whatever this bond is.. I know it's rare and I know not everyone gets to experience this. This is truly a blessing I'm forever grateful for.
[center [pic https://78.media.tumblr.com/3fe90faafac754a270866c638baa8751/tumblr_p5gkj8tXoX1v42jzoo3_540.gif]
[size10 And you say,
[b [i "As long as I'm here, no one can hurt you
Don't wanna lie here, but you can learn to
If I could change the way that you see yourself
You wouldn't wonder why you hear 'they don't deserve you'"]]]]
[size10 Grateful for the friends I have now.
I have some friends who I've known for a long time and they are still in my life because they deserve to be. I appreciate them and I love them. ]
[center [size10 Is there a place where I can hide away?
Red lips, french kiss my worries all away
There must be a sweeter place
We can sugarcoat the taste
There must be a sweeter—
Place where I can
Ooh, you'll really wanna know where I've been all this time
So lemme tell ya
Ooh, got two feet on the ground and felt what real is like
What it was like
Livin' out of the scene, out in the wild
Learnin' to breathe
Up in the clouds, far from the crowds
I can't believe I can be loud
[b Holdin' hands with the darkness] and knowin' my heart is allowed~
[center [size10 When you stay up all night.]]
[center [size10 I feel lost. I wish there was a map or an objective/quest list of exactly what I'm supposed to do like a game. Sometimes I wonder; am I holding myself back? do I have some unlocked potential I don't know of? I don't think this is everything, right..? Sometimes I don't know if this is where I'm supposed to be. I don't know if I chose correctly.
Are my decisions the right ones?
Am I looking at life wrong..? Is the fact that I'm questioning everything a red flag? I wish.. somebody, something would guide me.. I really do.]]
[size10 Watched the Code Geass movie finally and wow...
I'm happy. One of my ships sailed happily at least..
Yeah, fu Shirley.
C.C. is just everything, like...
What a ride or die, what a Waifu.
Lelouch is so lucky, OTP!
Good.. tired of all my pairings ending in tragedy. </3
I hope we get the show back, the ending was for sure leading into something else. Another movie? who knows. I'll take anything.]
[size10 It's true that I asked for your help but it's just a tad annoying now. Yeah, I get it. [i Stay away] is what you're basically saying. I mean, you just don't get it. How difficult it is.
You don't know what it's like.
Ahh, these red roses really do make my desk look so pretty though.
But yeah, I get it.
I get it..]
[center [pic https://66.media.tumblr.com/05c8f2df381ffac05d9e0ac09b948b7d/tumblr_pm738u3dI31qh1qauo1_500.gifv]]
[size10 I hope you’re well.
I can never hate you, so..
I really hope you’re okay.]
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