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[font "century gothic" [#ff721a Just as the title says... I'm looking for some roleplaying partners.
[b Here what I like!]
[b What I dislike]
Pregnancy of any time
I will not tolerate god-moders
Sadly I don't really have a ideas right now but I am pretty open to anything. I'm sure we can come with something!
[font "century gothic" [+orange Ugh...I'm feeling better but I am still feeling kind of sore and icky....I think I got my dad's cold -_-'...I hope dad is feeling better... I hope I will be feeling better tomorrow... work will suck other wise...I'm sure I am going to be forced to do the truck...V_V...I honestly don't feel like lifting 50 pounds.
[font "century gothic" Idea for a story.
Your grieving over the loss of your soon to be spouse. Your spouse fell off the cruise boat that you were holding your wedding... It was a heart breaking. You waited and waited a body was never found. You never gave up hope. Your friends and family kept telling you to think of the odd but you refuse to give up. While desperately waiting a stranger approach you he smiled at you and say he has a gift for you. It was a present form you late spouse it was suppose to be a surprise after the wedding it was one of those rare fish with rainbow like scales.
[size10 [+orange Sigh. I always make mistakes in real life, on my lion game that I love... I don't want to know what else can go wrong today. Sigh. I hate this...sometime I hate myself...It's disgusting I want tear it apart... I wish I was never born sometimes... What the point of my existents...
[+Pink To be honest I don't really have much to say right now. My day been pretty boring... pretty gray... the only thing exciting was getting a Primal Felis. Also there a giant ass fly in the kitchen.... VwV I hate bugs.
[+pink Songs I don't want to forget about.
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ET3-t1jFmo0 Fine again]
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PYlS_kmxES0 Life is Beautiful]
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=03X0B6u-AxM Sick like Me]
[+pink Don't think that I don't care for you...because I still do. Your amazing person! I'm glad I was part of you life....I still want to be part of you life. But I understand you probably don't want that... I don't want to hurt you... I understand that hearing this right now isn't anything you want to hear...
[+pink I know you are trying but I don't want you to feel forced. [b You [u shouldn't] change you] just for me. [b You should always be you]... My heart just feels like it is cracking... I've been so stressed... I've been scared to talk to you which I shouldn't have been...But I was...even you were scared to talk to me... We shouldn't be scared to tell each other anything... I hate hurting you... I know you hate hurting me that is also why I think we have been avoiding this long talk.
I believe that you are trying... but part of me feels that our relationship is still stuck in the same rut. I've never had a long distant relationship before...it is very painful...when even I had to leave you it really hurt. It still hurts known that I have no idea when I will get to see you again... I understand you have to take care of Lennon. All I want is a little of your time... Sigh...I just don't see that happening...your trapped just as you have stated before... If I never get to see you.. our relationship will just stay the same... I don't want that... I want more out of a relationship... I'm sure you feel that same on that part? You want more out of a relationship don't you? I understand taking things slowly but if we move to slowly we will go no where. I know a lot of this has to do with the fact that we don't see each other enough.
I guess my questions are...when I first brought this up you said you were angry? Do you still feel that anger towards me? Do you even want to continue on like this? If you are feeling anger towards me it frightening me...it making me feel scared... But I suppose I could see why you were angry I was scared to tell you how I felt. I still am. I don't want to lose you. You always been a good friend to me. I know it hurts hearing that word friend... Do you think we will progress? I know it's so heartless of me to be having a lot of doubts... But right now I just don't see how we can progress... I hate to say it but I think we should just be friends...
I know how heartless and cruel of me to just say something like that... I think we were better as friends... I know it painful thing to hear...thinking it... writing it they hurt... deep down I think it better this away... I know you probably hate my guts now...but I want you to know that even if you hate me... I will always be your friend! I want us to stay close to you... I still want to do fun things with you... I'd love to take you places... I'd love it if you could live with me someday.
I don't want to hear that you will be a lone forever. You won't be. Your a beautiful girl who has an amazing personality. Your very strong and brave. Your kind, and loving.
[+pink ... I don't mean to be so blunt... Or to wait so long... I actually wrote up what I wanted to tell you last night...but I was scared to post it...I still have what I written... I'm still scared to post it... I'm still scared ....I shouldn't be but I am.... after reading what you wrote I feel I should rewrite what I was going post... But I feel it still covers what I was going to say...
[+pink Sigh...we I finish signing the title....my car will no longer be at my dads...It's heart breaking I do not want to see him go...Yes my car is a he...so that is very stressful. Talked about owning my own business today. That was pretty...interesting. My grandma and I would both be owners. That wouldn't be two bad but right down I have been down in the dumps. I might act fine around other but I really hurting deep down. It's hard to feel emotions through texts.
[https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=03X0B6u-AxM [+pink Sick like Me ]]
[+pink Work was okay but my coworkers were being stupid.... want to play game in the over or who can touch a hot rack the longest.... I told them I would be nice and not yell but told them they were being idiots and no Sweeny Todd....
Kids these days... what the hell... -_-' I hope tomorrow will be okay. We will talk more tomorrow. I will be able to give you a note...I might be late though....I have to go to grandma house for dinner and to talk about own my own business....also I have to take care of my car sigh... V_V' Sorry if I am distract I have a million things in my head. If there any more you want to talk about you can post it I will do my best to answer it all tomorrow.
[+pink I'm glad you got to apply to some jobs today. I think things will work out if things change. I hope we will be able to see each other more... That is one of the big issue...I will write more in here tomorrow. I'm tired still have to feed my lions. -_- There so many of them. Sorry I have nothing much for you to read. I am just getting tired.
[+pink Sadly I am going to have to respond to that after work. Sorry it take me a while to type. I will be back on once I get off. Sadly I won't be able to stay up to late since I have to work in the morning.
[+pink It sad we said that we wouldn't be scared to tell each other anything....here we are shaking in our boots scared to tell on another how we truly feel... We shouldn't have to feel this way....
So what I meant was when I asked if you were happy? Are you really happy with our relationship? All we do is text? We see each other occasionally. What I was saying is don't know if I go on if we just keep it like this. Seeing each other only once or twice a month and text all the time isn't a relationship... It's just a glorify friendship if that... Something has to change...
I didn't meant to be so blunt in message but I was scared...talking about this is frightening...But I was feeling unloved just like another friend I don't feel special...I feel like a friend. As I said before I think were both scared to move to the next step...Because what will happen to our friendship? It can go one or two aways. I think were both scared that it's going to go the opposite way...
I know you care... I know you want to see me but action speak louder than words. I wouldn't turn you down if you appear on my door step... I know you can't leave but that... If you can't even leave then how will you get to see me... I need attention.... I crave it... I want to feel it loved... I want to get butterfly... I want to go place... I want to see things with you... I want to experience new things... I want to move out with you but I can't pay for a house on my own... If you can't leave...then there no point of looking toward the future...
I know you parent aren't going to move back but what about you? What do you want? What is your desire? Do you want to live out there with them for rest of you life? Don't get me wrong I love how close your family is ... There is a saying that "We have all the time in the world" yes Time does but life is short....
Sometime I fear when I wake up I am going to be 80 years old think were did my life go... right now it difficult... with no full time job or being able to drive...but those are just minor things that can be fixed...
[size10 [+pink Another thing that I seem to go by if you want me you will fight for me....]]
I really don't care what other people on here think... They can kiss my ass for all I care. -__- Okay I will try posting back to all the text now I just need to reread them at least my phone number them...
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