Castle In My Mind

/ By SmallOne [+Watch]

Replies: 15 / 124 days 18 hours 4 minutes 40 seconds

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God, I feel sick. My stomach feels like it's stabbed... My doctor doesn't even know what's wrong and I'm getting discouraged.
  Small / SmallOne / 67d 10h 35m 2s
I miss my best friend... I feel he and I have grown distant in the last couple of months... I guess that's what happens when life gets rough for both parties.
  Small / SmallOne / 68d 5h 58m 19s
My cousin has skin cancer, it's affecting her liver, she's pregnant too.

I have to call CPS Monday because the cops won't do anything about the fucking crackheads across the street from me.

I'm overworked. I want to die. Yet, I staying here for my family.
  Small / SmallOne / 68d 23h 3m 42s
My hair is falling out little by little from my depression and anxiety. My doctor doesn't know how to keep it from falling out either. Well, if it does start get worse, I'll own it. I'll stay positive and wear wigs.
  Small / SmallOne / 75d 13h 47m 26s
Well, I'm gone. It's just a break. A break to get out there and focus on something other than my thoughts.
  Small / SmallOne / 78d 19h 34m 57s
You're so stupid. You're so stupid. You're so stupid. You always ruin everything.

This why it's hard to keep friends. You're not really be able stick around at this rate. You fucked up, again.
  Small / SmallOne / 79d 10h 27m 10s
I just want my Japan trip to get here already. My brother, Ryan, he's going with me. It'll be a month or even a two month trip. Destinations are Tokyo, Kyoto, and Okinawa. Just one more year, hopefully. I'll be out of this stupid city and away from this stressful house.
  Small / SmallOne / 81d 10h 57m 0s
I don't want to be dragged around anymore and my feet hurt. I'm exhausted. Emotionally exhausted and all I want to do is sleep.
  Small / SmallOne / 82d 14h 19m 38s
Today is going to be a long one. I'll be dragged around this stupid city by my sister. I hate it here. The only thing I like about this place is the closeness to the waterfront. I refuse to live somewhere that isn't by some large body of water or even a river or a creek. I have to be by the water.
  Small / SmallOne / 82d 18h 16m 36s
Just like that, the void was ripped to shreds by the forceful jaws of my endless depression and a deprived sense of anger. Anger for no reason at all. No, angry towards myself for letting things go this far without even trying to stop it.


No, I've stopped trying because a severe case of Clinical Depression. An eating disorder that can be treated, but it cannot be taken away. I want the pain to be numbed. I want the hurt of this everyday struggle to end...
  Small / SmallOne / 83d 7h 41m 48s
Never once have I felt this way. I feel like I'm lost in a void. A very peaceful and quiet void, one I never want to be rescued from. I'm staying away from Facebook, Messenger, Instagram, and other forms of toxicities this world is throwing at me.

I just want this perfect feeling to stick around. However, I know it won't stay with me for much longer. Something always comes along to ruin whatever amount of tranquility I feel.

It's sad, but it's life. Life is like riding the waves and waiting for the perfect opportunity to surf the perfect Pipeline.
  Small / SmallOne / 83d 17h 37m 5s
I honestly hate who I am. Why do I always feel like I'm hurting myself by doing something that's for me for a change? Why is it that I was made to battle against my mind and my body every moment of my life? Just... Why?
  Small / SmallOne / 89d 13h 7m 42s
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