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[size10 I like my girls just like I like my honey; sweet
A little selfish
I like my women like I like my money; green
A little jealous
'Cause I'm a beautiful wreck
A colorful mess, but I'm funny
Oh, I'm a heartbreak vet
With a stone-cold neck, yeah, I'm charming
All the pretty girls in the world
But I'm in this space with you
Colored out the lines
I came to find, my fire was fate with you
Heartache would stay with you
Fly great escapes with you]
[center [pic https://66.media.tumblr.com/f428d2b6ff5944d6e72c22b46e0183c1/tumblr_pnpkdy0T0c1tw2hyao3_r1_540.gifv]]
As much as I resent you right now.. I'm living in memories that honestly help me be less angry at you -- even though it spikes up when I think about things again.
I miss us, a lot. I'm not even saying the ones in the honeymoon phase years ago, that's a given. I'm saying us two months ago. It was short-lived, but we were.. all over each other, we were happy. I know it's cause I had visited and gone back home, so all those feelings are like a breath of fresh air, and it feels new again. I didn't have those worries of being replaced, I had no insecurities for a small moment.. I miss that.
Something about me being there in person, and knowing I only have a small amount of time to have fun.. pushes you to learn to be understanding and patient, and actually wanting to make up. You were right about that.. it's easier to forgive when they're in front of you sometimes. Because I'd be able to hold you and tell you sorry, and you'd feel more sincere, we'd make up and make out.
Maybe you'd be able to see me saying you 'screw you' from anger, you would be able to see a hint of actually wanting to literally. I know it sounds bad. But I notice sometimes we just.. have to do that to get it out of our system, and that gives you more ease to talk to me, to walk me through your true thoughts, to be more open to me.
I miss calling you these pet names again. I miss teasing you, making fun of you till I know you make that 'hmph' sound and a jigglypuff face.
Passion is what I put out, whether it's anger or love.
And passion is what I loved seeing in you.
So.. when I see you've given up, when you don't bother -- it cuts me more than you spouting angrily back. Because it feels like you admit I'm right, and I don't want to be. I want to be proven wrong for once.
I sometimes blame myself for not getting over what I need to let you back in.. because I miss it so bad. I desperately.. just want to forget it all and truly leave anything that happened in the past where they belong. No reminders, no lingering things, nothing. I'm still trying to heal certain wounds, otherwise.. I'd be having you back with open arms like always..
And maybe you wouldn't have -- maybe we wouldn't have end up this way.]
I will write like a dream.
And I will be so confident about it.
[size10 We came too close to the edge now
We almost died last night
This champagne laced in regret now, I relapse every time
Your heart too hard to protect now, it hurts to watch you cry
My feelings mixed up right now]
[center [youtube https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0QTlz9mbfOo]]
[center [pic http://i63.tinypic.com/2evrz1z.jpg]]
[size10 I read the old letters I made you.
A lot are pretty cringey, and cheesy.
But.. I know that each one came from me pouring my heart out, my real feelings into every word to you.
I know I'm not the most comforting to you right now.. quite the opposite.
I caused you pain, and I hate myself every time I do.
I may have changed a bit over the years
But-- those letters.. I still mean every word and feel every emotion in it.
I remember the previous post I made about soulmates.
You will always be my soulmate.. you've been such a big part of my growth as a person, helping me and supporting me.. being patient to me, loving me more than anyone could and would love me. I know that.
Through all the changes that we both had, we fell in love with each other again with them.
I know that no other person will accept and know me as much as you.
That is someone I did find worth moving my world to.
I would be a complete fool to let something like this go..
And a fool I am for making you feel not worth it.
Though you loved me, it came with pain.
Even though it has ripped me to shreds, you made the right call.
Because I'll be damned if I have you suffer more than you did when you're with me. I know it only gets more complicated if shit doesn't go my way..
We found out we are not meant to be lovers.
But I truly believe.. we are meant to be soulmates.
You will soon find out what I'm about to say means but..
You are my person.]
[center [pic https://66.media.tumblr.com/07521a000c69f65a127d70d9f2d3efdc/tumblr_pq91tuXCK61qhg86k_400.jpg]
I love it when you make posts about me, about how much you're in love with me. Because.. I obviously feel the same way.
Hearing it from you just.. makes my heart warm.
When I hear you cry happily, I can't help but get emotional too.
Just when I felt like I wasn't doing good.. having a night like that lets me know that maybe I am doing right, that I treat you how I plan to.
You deserve the best.. and I always aim for your happiness.
I love nights like last night..
I never thought I would have no trouble professing my love for someone.
Considering how I am, I always felt like I would have trouble but.. meeting you has shown the opposite.
You make me love to my fullest.
And I am so.. grateful and overjoyed that you love me back with just as much passion, that you're madly and deeply in love with me.
I'm so so so madly and deeply in love with you too.
My love, my precious bunny.
I didn't think I would use so much pet names either.
But cause I use those.. know that I'm just.. all about you.
You feel like home.. that's how I know you're my soulmate.
I love you.]]
[center [pic https://66.media.tumblr.com/2d78ecb953d1ede34957bb827825252e/tumblr_ppzdr5QW2J1s5bkp1o4_r1_540.gif]
[i You are my queen.]
Somehow your presence instantly makes my body react.
And I just wanna give you all of me without stopping.
I like when you have that suggestive tone, when you're about to surrender to me.
Though you put up a challenge sometimes, which only drives me even more.
I don't know if my energy alone is the reason I get the way I am.
But undeniably, our chemistry has been a force unstoppable.]]
[size10 I thought of a future so many times with her.
I imagine just being happy and living together a lot.
Sometimes.. the white dress on her came to mind.
Even now, I think about it. How twisted am I?
It only makes me hurt more.]
[center [pic https://66.media.tumblr.com/65832e2437584d7bd18bb1e40f07b206/tumblr_p7radgK9eb1qlzdpio1_540.gif]
As much as the idea of romance in movies is dead and seen as cheesy, admittedly I fall victim to wanting something like that.
When I say that.. I mean I try to be the partner that jumps all in because of love, and at the same time I want to have that for me.
It's like I forget that reality will not allow that, even if you try.
You can't be reckless.. you can't just do it as you please without consequence later.
You're just racing against time.. and maybe the journey might seem like a movie.. but the ending.. it may not end the same way.
But I'm just this fool who wants to believe in that still.
That two people in love will follow the other, do anything for.
It sucks.. it really does.
I still have hope.. but I don't want to put more hurt in you for something so uncertain.
It's just unfair.. to the both of us.
Only in my dreams.. am I certain for this happiness.]]
[center [pic https://66.media.tumblr.com/b2d3956dfff9ca4a0c30f866767d55c7/tumblr_pmzk93BB8J1qzwoilo2_540.gif]
[center [pic https://66.media.tumblr.com/090dbde025d6723b8c27e227889dd022/tumblr_ppnql5BZZB1xqq5qqo2_540.gif]
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[size10 You know.. I've always thought this, but tonight I'm suddenly reminded.
You're so admirable.. in so many ways.
But right now, hearing you sleep in peace.. it makes me want you to always be at peace.
You deal with so much at home, with constant stresses.
Had I been in your shoes, dealing with someone like that on a daily..
I don't think I could ever be as strong as you are.
I don't think I'd turn out as wonderful as you are..
And on top of that, you strive so hard despite what's trying to bring you down.
You don't give up, and you're as positive as you can be.
You raise me up.. you give me hope when I need it.
You inspire me, you know? You always want the best for me.
You're so encouraging.. you're so thoughtful towards me.
And you're protective of me.. you're so headstrong.
Which is why you are the most important person to me that I've met.
And one of the many reasons why I can't stop loving you.
I want you to know that you are nothing like her and never will be like her.
I want you to continue to pursue your dreams, or at least the goal you hope for to be comfortable and happy.
I will support you and encourage you, just like you would for me.
I hope I can raise you up, just like you raise me up.
And I hope I can learn to protect you through it all too.
One thing for sure.. you really live up to what you are known for.
Blooming regardless of adversity, a sunflower in the midst of weeds.
Keep being you.. I will continue to be the pillar you lean on when you need it.
[center [pic http://i63.tinypic.com/2evrz1z.jpg]]
[size10 Today I learned something.
I read that your soulmate doesn't necessarily mean it's the person you will end up with.
A soulmate.. is someone who takes you to where you're supposed to be, or where you should be.
They are the companion along your journey of growth.
They inspire you.. to be the best version of yourself.
So.. even though I'm not happy with how things are lately..
Thank you for being my soulmate.
No matter where our paths take us.. I consider you my soulmate.
[center [pic https://78.media.tumblr.com/e6e822424f9eec33a467aff48a1789a1/tumblr_p3iauySOWP1rqz9syo1_540.gif]
/ 1y 119d 10h 28m 26s
All posts are either in parody or to be taken as literature. This is a roleplay site. Sexual content is forbidden.