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As hopeful as she had been, mainly because this was her only lead, Rhea was surprised to find that the man had actually come through here. That expression came through on her face, but how the robot noticed it, she had no idea. Still, she was glad for the additional details. Well, at first she was. It soon grew to be a great deal too many very quickly. The Pyrenian stood back patiently, looking for a place to cut the bot off. It took a while, but she finally managed to interject without feeling like she was completely without manners.
[+lightcoral “Yes, D12, that is very fascinating. He is a marvel indeed.”] The last quip was said as she restrained herself from rolling her eyes. [+lightcoral “But do you think you could tell me where they went off to? I need to talk to Dante and it is somewhat important.”] That was the truth, though it could probably wait a little while if she knew when/if he was coming back. Really she just wanted to avoid missing him if he so happened to be trying to hightail it off the planet.
[google-font http://fonts.googleapis.com/css?family=Montserrat][Montserrat D12 straightened up a little and made a quick sweep of its memory banks, finding the image of Dante from the day before and running through the numerous visitors it had seen since then. The imaging software it used was not the greatest but even in barely a second it had found its answer and nodded once to Rhea.[+4286f4 “Indeed I have.”] For a few moments it was quiet but the look of expectancy on Rhea’s face rather drove home the need for more than confirmation.
[+4286f4 “He came in about an hour ago, and requested my masters services. It is quite remarkable that he now functions. I would like to investigate such a turnaround in greater detail as to ascertain-“] D12 went on about its interest in Dante, his parts and the sum of those parts, for as long as Rhea would let him. It was particularly interested in just how they had managed to get him up and moving when it and its master had not been able to even though they were the more experienced. The rambling of this kind went on unabated.
Rhea felt more comfortable being off the ship now that she had a set destination. Before they had been wandering from shop to shop, which left her exposed for longer intervals of time. This time she knew exactly where she was going, though that loss of time came at the cost of being able to think over exactly what she needed to say. She still wasn’t sure how she was going to get that lady, who had been rather frustrated when they parted, to do anything else for her.
Coming to the shop, she stood outside for a moment, trying to gather her nerves back up before walking in. But as she entered and looked around, the little human girl was not to be seen. It was only her robotic companion. He greeted her kindly, as he was designed to do. The fact that the owner was out gave her some hope. It was a long shot, but what if she wasn’t present because she was with Dante?
[+lightcoral “Hello, D12.”] She spoke with a polite smile that could be heard, but not seen. [+lightcoral “I am sorry to bother you, but you wouldn’t happened to have seen Dante, the man you and your mistress tried to help, have you? “] It was forward and to the point. There wasn’t much need for pleasantries with the machine, though she had given some out of habit all the same.
[google-font http://fonts.googleapis.com/css?family=Montserrat][Montserrat Tera and Jax did not go to follow her rather they remained at the table just trying to contemplate what was going on and why. Unlike Rhea they were not incredibly in touch with their intellectual pursuits or their emotions. They were much more impulsive beings and living in the moment. It left them more innocent to life and its changing values but that pure innocence also meant they were quite susceptible to moments like these, where things confused them easily and they could not fathom answers to their questions.
Leaving Rhea to roam back onto Fensome, the port was rather still and quiet at that time. Living on artificial stations like this it was difficult to have things occur to set times. How could one keep a schedule in a place where time was quite irrelevant? Indeed on many of the signs for stores she passed were individual open times. Where one establishment may open in the theoretical morning, another would open hours later. In that way two businesses could run opposite to one another and not interfere or take trade from each other.
Luckily enough for Rhea, a small amount of luck in her sea of misfortune, this particular time the mechanics shop she had visited was open. And perhaps a further sign of a chance in her luck there was no woman but D12, stood still and staring out at the street ahead. On approach its head would turn toward her and tilt at an angle.[+4286f4 “Hello ma’am. The owner is currently out. How may I be of assistance?”]
Rhea woke a little later than she predicted. Not by anything too major, just a couple of hours. She was groggy. A side effect of sleeping entirely too long. It was expected. What wasn’t expected was to be empty handed upon waking. Sitting up, she shuffled around looking for the two crystals she had previously been holding. They were nowhere to be found, not her bed or anyplace else in her room. Someone must have come in and taken them, and she had a feeling who, but whether that was a good thing would remain a mystery for now.
It might have done the woman well to sit around and wake up a little better before wandering about the ship. She could tell by sound alone that they were still at port. They’d either never left or found someplace new in the time she had been asleep. Rhea’s money was on the first option. She wasn’t too alarmed by this for the time being, so she began her shamble down to the dining area. Strangely enough, this is just where she found the others. The pair looked rather solemn, giving her the impression that Dante had already torn through the ship letting everyone know how much of an ass he really was. It was not a thought she had to wonder about long, as Tera gave a bit of explanation unprompted.
Mood souring further, Rhea began to mumble. [+lightcoral “I cannot believe him…”] Though in fact, after everything she had heard the day before, she could believe it. [+lightcoral “He’s probably trying to wait us all out, get us all of the ship so he doesn’t have anything to worry about anymore.”] There was an uncharacteristic bite to the woman’s words. One she would almost immediately regret using as she saw the expression on the others’ faces, especially Jax who she was sure wasn’t grasping the true nuances of the situation.
Rhea didn’t wait for Tera to start chewing her out before she back peddled. [+lightcoral “I am sorry, I didn’t mean that…”] She kind of did, as she really believed that was what he was up to with this, but she didn’t have to be so cynical about it. [+lightcoral “Dante and I talked; it did not go well…”] There was a good chance Tera would know basically what that meant, though Jax looked just as confused as he had before. [+lightcoral “This is my fault… I am going to fix this.”] How fruitful such an attempt would be was unclear, but Rhea needed to try.
Without so much as another word, the woman turned back the way she came. It was off to her room, so she could get dressed to go out. Unfortunately, that meant shoes and cloak, but she was ready quickly and setting out before anyone could tell her to do any differently. There was no way to say where Dante was for sure, but Rhea knew where to start. That roboticist mentioned knowing the man, so there was a chance he may have met up with her before hiding out. Whether or not Rhea would be convincing enough to get the girl to tell her anything would be another story though. Still, she headed off in the direction of the shop, shrouded as she could manage, in hopes that she might be able to fix this, even a little bit.
[google-font http://fonts.googleapis.com/css?family=Montserrat][Montserrat For the time that Rhea was out many things had changed. Working from her perspective things would be rather the same on waking up. Lights dimmed, room quiet, everything rather still. On moving from her relaxed state her arms would be empty. There was no blanket or cloth with the crystals wrapped within and no sign of them spilled accidentally over the bed or onto the floor. A look about the room turned up no answers and no clues as to what had occurred. They were just gone.
Emerging out into the ship, seeking out the others perhaps, she would find Tera and Jax sat at the main table, a packet of pink cookies half eaten before the large man whilst the woman was nursing a particularly large sugary drink. It was double the size of her usual ones and yet filled to the brim, not a single drop having been taken. Each seemed in a state of confusion and wonder and the furry woman would look up at Rhea somewhat dazed.
[+red “If you're looking for Cap.. he's gone.”] It was hard to get out but she managed eventually to say it. She recalled how Jax had fixed his horn and how the man had been thrown back, how Dante had sent Tera away immediately when she went to see him and how several hours ago, he had ordered them to their rooms. Being dutiful and wanting to be helpful, they did as he asked, but on emerging an hour or so ago it was clear to see the man was no longer on the ship.[+red “The engines are locked out, helm, navigation, everything is locked behind pass codes that are hundreds of characters long. We aren't barred from anywhere on the ship but we can't do anything with it.”]
She was unsure what to do as they knew next to nothing about Fensome nor where Dante could have gone. The ship was here and she had checked the ships funds and found it to be about where she remembered it, so he hadn't absconded on another ship – at least not one he had paid for. The last few days had just been so testing and the feeling of elation to hear Dante was back had been crushed when he had barked at her to leave him alone, further pushed down when he was discovered to be gone. It seemed none of them were left unaffected by the last week.
True to her word, Rhea went straight to finding Jax. She had noticed how careful Dante had been to keep his head still to stop from losing any more blood. And she might have been pissed as all hell, but she wasn’t going to leave him confined to that bed like a prisoner on his own ship.
In meeting the mechanic, she warned him that the captain was in a bad mood and that he should tread carefully, but she doubted he took it to heart like he should have. Rhea just hoped that Dante cooled off enough to not take his frustrations out on Jax, but she would not hold her breath. Not after that display, though she knew deep down that it was in part her fault. She would not take all of the blame, but part of it for sure. Perhaps she shouldn’t have put that chip back and just suffered on her own. He wouldn’t have the chance to be happy again like wished for him, but he also wouldn’t be able to spread his misery onto others.
Next was Kashia. That little brat was a little harder to find. No doubt she was hiding. Rhea didn’t think she actually knew what was coming, but when she found her slinking about the cargo deck it was clear that she was trying to avoid something, even though she didn't know what it was. [+lightcoral “Medication, now.”] There was an unnatural authority in the woman’s voice. Something she had not used in a very, very long time.
Shrinking back, the Shelvi girl was practically sent reeling at seeing the look of wretchedness and irritation on her Aunt’s face. It did not fit in her mind. Rhea never got this angry, let alone this angry with her. [+orange “But, Auntie, you said…”]
[+lightcoral “I don’t care what I said, give it back.”] There was no energy left to lecture her on everything else, for now she would focus on the directive of getting her powder back and that could come later.
Kashia could feel that it wasn’t the right time to return the sleep aid that Rhea had entrusted to her, but she also didn’t know how to fight with her. At all. She opened to her mouth to explain one more time, however she was cut off before anything came out. Shoulders falling as she discovered this was a battle she could not win, the girl motioned for her to follow as she took her to the hiding place she picked. It wasn’t anything too clever, just a little hole in the wall cabinet that had nothing but dust in it before she arrived. Kashia doubted anyone realized it was there, which was perfect for her purpose, until she was cowed into giving up the ghost.
Passing the bottle off, she gave one last comment. [+orange “Just be careful, please... I am worried about you.”] Never in her life had she seen Rhea in a state like this, and it was frightening.
She nodded, but otherwise brushed the comment off. The petite woman had no plans to do anything that stupid. Like she said, there were things she needed to accomplish, then maybe she could think about whether or not she really wanted to go on. Normally that was a thought that would fill her with guilt, but for the time being she was long passed being able to feel any individual emotions through the complicated mess inside of her.
Her final stop was to the kitchen to grab a glass of something to drink. She carried it with her to her room and sat down at her desk. There she was able to mix some of the root powder into the beverage. The quantity was a great deal larger than her regular dosage, but she knew it wouldn’t be enough to do her any actual harm. Rhea would, however, be passed out for at least the next twenty-four hours and she was very much okay with that. Forcing down the terrible tasting concoction, the woman took the time to write out a little note to stick on her nightstand. It explained that she was merely sleeping and gave an estimated time for when she should wake up. She hadn’t bothered to lock the door, so if anyone were so inclined to come in any alarm at her failure to wake at their call would be subsided by her message.
Everything all in place, Rhea looked back to the pair of Pyrenian core’s on her desk. They were still bundled up under her lamp. On some sleep-deprived whim, she stood back from her bed and went to scoop them up. Bringing them back, she curled up in her covers with them wrapped in close to her. Strange, even in this state, they gave her the feeling that she wasn’t alone. It was comforting. With that as her last thought, the woman passed out. Her heavily drug-induced sleep would be dreamless, finally giving her some peace after trudging through the events of the last few days.
[google-font http://fonts.googleapis.com/css?family=Montserrat][Montserrat Of course this is how she would react; this was her modus operandi. She stoked an argument, feigned being the victim, brought on the tears and ended it by storming out with some snappy comment shouted back at him. He was trying his best to remain somewhat adult about this, to not rant and rave, but she had tipped him past that point with her feigned indignation and sense of hurt.[+royalblue "Run away again Rhea, that is how you solve all your problems. Cry and run."] He called after her and lay back in the bed.
In truth he perhaps should, and wanted, to get up and chase after her. Perhaps he could have found the right words to say to apologise and to get her to understand where he was coming from. In practice, in reality, he could not care less if she ran off the ship right then and there and that was the last time he saw her or any of them. He was done with it all. If they wanted him to sit in his chair and pretend to lead them then fine. But he would not coddle them. They would all stand on their own two feet without his assistance.
As far as Dante could see, this was the breaking point for him and the crew of this ship. He wanted them all gone and he wanted his solitude back. At least on his own he did not have to listen to peoples incessant ranting and raving that he was not doing what they wanted. If he had been by himself, then the chip would have stayed removed and he wouldn't have to lay in that bed trying his level best to remain calm and collected when what he really wanted was to get up and hit something.
But again; Dante could not do what [i he] wanted. Instead he would have to wait for Jax, wait to be repaired by the oaf who had damaged him by tearing off his horn. And by then he would have calmed down, his mood would have mellowed, and he would be left to stew in his self-loathing.
Even when he was repaired, Jax thrust back against the wall with enough force to dent the metal, Dante retreated to the bridge and his seat. When Tera was told by Jax that Dante was up, he was alive, she had ignored the large mans worried and fearful expression and rushed to see for herself, only to be told in not so pleasant terms that she was bared from the bridge and that if she had anything to say she could kindly direct it to Rhea and her dolt of a niece. Dante was.. not in a good mood, that was for sure.
Rhea could barely believe her ears. He had just said himself that they were his children. And that was before his emotions were back in place. The purely logical Dante had said it, so it had to be true. But here he was throwing the tantrum of the century because he felt it unfair to be bogged down by the burdens of those he had chosen to surround himself with. He was acting like these connections and obligations were thrust upon him because he was some inorganic being when they were in fact the everyday encumbrance that every person living in a community had to deal with. She could hardly stand to hear it, but she was tired. Rhea was not going to argue any more right now. If it wasn’t his job to take care of others, it wasn’t hers to try and help him through this.
Bringing her hands down, she stood from her chair. As steadfast as she was in her decision to leave, there was still a few things left to say. But she would not be able to do it with delicacy at this point. [+lightcoral “How dare you, Dante…”] It was the only way she could start. [+lightcoral “Fine, you do not want to be a father. You don’t want others to rely on you? Then so be it. My family can take care of the girls as soon as they reform. They know enough about Pyrenians to get them by… You can tell the others that you don’t want them around anymore yourself.”] She walked to the door. [+lightcoral “I will send Jax back in to try and fix your head. He is the one who ripped your horn off in the first place. He can let Tera know you are awake and you can deal with her then.”]
Then she left, off to track down Jax to pass along the news that Dante had awakened, then she would find Kashia to get her medication. She needed to sleep. Rhea did not want to deal with this any more.
[google-font http://fonts.googleapis.com/css?family=Montserrat][Montserrat The stammering is perhaps what had him catching his breath, his chest fluctuating even as he lay there looking as angry as his voice tried to entail, golden eyes shimmering as she threw back just as much as she got from him. He could speak for a week and not hit the impactful points like she could. It drove on his anger that much more because it only made her words bite that much more. She was hitting the proverbial nail on the head.
Even as her head dipped and she covered her face with her hands, he shook his head lightly, keeping himself in a somewhat composed manner to stave off his own stutters as he replied,[+royalblue “But I’m not their father.. they aren’t my children.. I’m nothing to them or the others but a body of wiring and synthetic skin.”] For a man of naught more than wiring and skin, he was struggling to keep his voice level and from fluctuating, though he did keep to a quiet level even as she wept on.
[+royalblue “I am nothing more than the sum of my parts.”] He was speaking to the room now, unable to see her though it was unlikely either could look at one another.[+royalblue “My emotions, my feelings, my very actions are synthetic and fake but I am just expected to ignore that and get on with my life? For the betterment of four other people? Am I expected to live my life just so they are happy and can rely on me to do their bidding? How does that make me anymore than-than-than, a damn robot, a bloody servant, a [i fucking slave!]”] The last words were hissed through tightly clenched teeth.
[+royalblue “I lived that life for four centuries.. I’ve tried to break free of it so.. many.. times.”] The tiredness now crept up in his voice, left hand striking the best with each word.[+royalblue “But yet here I am.. forced back into that life just so others can function.. forced to live with others decisions, others choices that force me to continue just for them.. forced to live a role they dictate so their lives are easier and then watching as they all wither away and die with time..”] He had gone through that cycle many times overs and it never got easier. Even the ones who were only with him for short amounts of time had left their impact upon him and taken a little piece away with them.
[+royalblue “I may be a synth, I may possess this chip, but I am just a fancy robot that can be hurt with words more so than actions..”] He closed his eyes then, not wanting to stare up at the lights anymore as they irritated his damaged skin about his eyes, a trickle of liquid running down the side of his face and lost within his snowy white hair.
As this scene played out before her, she was drawn back to her conversation with Tera. She didn’t understand what was happening, nor why. Her mind wasn’t following where she had misstepped to mislead him to what she meant. Rhea was overwhelmed by it all once more, and those small, unsteady streams on her face grew. She was shaking in her seat as he came at her bitingly.
[+lightcoral “I-I-I”] She stuttered over herself like she had when they first met. In fact this situation felt eerily similar to that. [+lightcoral “I d-don’t understand wh-why you are y-y-yelling at me.”] Frustration at her own inability added to the horrific monster of emotions growing in her. But she did not give herself time to try and calm back down so she could speak. Rhea was just going to try and work through it. [+lightcoral “I never s-said you were selfish. I am g-g-glad you finally talked to me.”] It wasn’t exactly going how she had hoped before all this break up business began, but she was glad to hear it all the same. [+lightcoral “I am g-glad you are th-thinking about yourself. I want that m-more than a-anything. This is the r-r-r…”] She cut off a moment, it was difficult to say that this was right. [+lightcoral “Right!”] She practically shouted the word so that it would come out before dropping down to an acceptable volume. [+lightcoral “th-thing to do, so long as that is h-how you feel.”]
More to say still, Rhea did finally take a moment to breath. She hated to be so ill composed. It was exactly the sort of thing Dante would prey on with his coldness and logic. [+lightcoral “But, I am sorry. You cannot expect me to go on being perfectly happy. The truth of the matter is that I am hurting, no matter the reason, I have to say goodbye to the person I am in love with and let that feeling die.”] The woman hadn’t thought such a concept would be hard to understand, but here she was having to spell it out.
Then it was on to the matter of the chip. That she had less defense for, even though it was what she initially expected to be berated for. [+lightcoral “I am sorry, but just like I cannot go and end it all, you cannot just toss everything away. We both have things we have to do, responsibilities to uphold. And yes, it was s-selfish of me to make that choice, but you have others who depend on you. They need you to be who you’ve always been. You cannot be a father if you cannot love your children… and those girls, they…”] Again, Rhea lost it. Her face falling to her hands, she wept, unable to continue what she was saying.
[google-font http://fonts.googleapis.com/css?family=Montserrat][Montserrat Despite his attempt at honesty, at giving her the answers to questions he could see she wanted to ask but was too polite to do, here he was feeling worse than ever by her response. It showed through her speaking as he progressively lost that glow in his gaze and sunk further into the bed. Her laugh felt more sarcastic than her words in truth and he did well to maintain his silence until she had spoken.
[+royalblue “This is why I did not want to talk of this with you.”] It was said to the room rather than her directly, spoken in a quieter voice and it conveyed his disappointment well.[+royalblue “I say I did it for you, to save you from pain and sadness and I am deemed to be too controlling. That you are an adult and can make your own decisions and I have no right to do something because I felt it was better for you.”] Whilst that was how he felt, that she had taken a token gesture and made him feel far worse than he had in actually implementing it, he could somewhat understand her belief that he could not say what did or did not hurt her. At least that had some grounding.
[+royalblue “And then when I tell you the truth, open myself up to tell you I did it because I was scared, I am branded selfish. I did it for my own selfish needs rather than considering what you would want.”] His head tilted to the side, enough that the liquid did not gush out but so he could see her again.[+royalblue “Which is it Rhea? Am I a selfish man or a controlling one? Or both? Or are you the controlling one who doesn’t want me to think for you or myself? Should you be the one in control? Just like you took control and forced me to take back this stupid emotion chip!”] His words were soft and quiet at first but the anger bubbled to the surface near to the end and he seethe through clenched teeth with the final word.
[+royalblue “On the one hand, I am trying to dictate how you should feel and in the other I am being too selfish and not considering how you feel. I cannot do one or the other for I am damned either way. I cannot do what I think is best for you because I am not you, yet when I try to do what is best for me I am self-centred.”] His voice had dropped back down to a calm level though he hard to bite hard on his words. The name of Atlas was almost on the tip of his tongue, wanting to dredge up old arguments from the villa and throw that back in her face but there would be little to no point. He felt rather trapped in this situation and given no correct path to take. Whichever route he took led to her hating him as he understood things.[+royalblue “You expect so much from me and give me no leeway in which to give you what you want. I am strangled by your contradictions and made to feel inadequate when I do not react how you want or do as you would like.”] He was tired, or at least his body gave the appearance of that and he lifted his hand to rub at his eyes, leaving it over his face for a moment not wanting to look at her.[+royalblue "Why is it okay for you to selfishly decide I must replace the chip, but I cannot think of myself in my own decisions?"]
It was a little difficult to listen to his hypothetical apology, especially given the subject matter around it. What all had he gone through? And on the converse side, what had he put others through? Rhea found that she didn’t actually want to know all the details. It was enough to see that it haunted him and that he was still learning. Even for one as inquisitive as she, there were just some things she’d rather left unknown.
But the thought passed quickly, as Dante got to the point. It was surprising. After all this talk of protecting others and self-sacrifice, it was strange to see him put this sort of wall around himself. Rhea did not think it was an altogether bad thing. She would very much like to see him care for himself more, to see how important he is in the eyes of others. So that he might stop trying to run into danger at every turn, at the very least. However, there was a bitterness to it, which made this pill hard to swallow.
[+lightcoral “Then… I guess this is different.”] It mattered very little how she saw the world when what his choice really boiled down to was his own view. [+lightcoral “As someone who has been there… for me it was worth it… for the right person.”] There had to be a connection, a spark, she wouldn’t be willing to go through that for just anyone. [+lightcoral “So, I suppose what this really means is that I wasn’t enough to be worth the risk.”] There was that feeling of inadequacy again, but at least this time she felt she might be able to grasp a sense of closure. She knew [I why] he did all this now, and for her that counted for something.
Not really able to hold back any longer, she wiped at her eyes. It wasn’t an uncontrollable sobbing like she had endured a few days prior, but it was still a display of her feelings. [+lightcoral “I can live with this… I mean, obviously I have to.”] She laughed lightly. Rhea wasn’t about to try and force someone into a relationship with her when he didn’t really want it… well he wanted it, but for some people that wasn’t enough. [+lightcoral “But it is an answer that I cannot be mad at.”] It was more than a systematic list or pros and cons that he weighed back and forth; it was genuine feeling. And she would not hold it against him. At least, not like she would have. This wouldn’t change the fact that she would eventually leave, but it would make his presence easier to endure in the meantime.
[google-font http://fonts.googleapis.com/css?family=Montserrat][Montserrat [+royalblue “And if you know of the pain to come, of the displeasure, the agony, the suffering, you willingly walk into that? If you know as a certainty that with love comes loss, with hope comes the dashing blow and with equal parts they will cancel the other out, then I cannot begin to understand why someone would willingly give themselves to this.”] The conversation had expanded upon her mentioning of ending it all, of shattering her core so that she did not return. It was a thought he had considered with the twins to save them any more suffering in their new lives.
But this was not about death and what it could do for emotions. This was about what he had done, why he had done it, whether he was justified.[+royalblue “ I understand you dislike how I went about things and I can apologise for doing so in a very callous and cruel manner. Like I say, I have never had a consensual relationship before, so I have no history in breaking up with someone. But..”] There it was. That hesitation he often gave when about to go into something personal. Dante was becoming more famous for his hesitations and pauses than he was for his life before the twins.
Yet at this moment, looking on her and seeing that slight smile she had that was almost non-existent, the stoppage in his words only lasted a few seconds. Taking a deep breath to compose the fears and emotions beginning to rise up he let out slowly.[+royalblue “I say I did it to protect you from sadness, from pain, stop what happened with Sephora from happening with me. But in truth I did it for myself. I heard how you reacted, I listened to how you talked of her and what she meant to you and it.. scared me. I did not want to feel that same way should anything happen to you. I did not want to go through that loss, to experience what you did.”] Honesty, at last.
[+lightcoral “Because that feeling is worth it… to be wanted and loved by another is a wonderful experience. I don’t want to forget how that feels... I think it would be a demerit to Sephora’s memory to cut myself off and throw away any chance at companionship just because she died. It’s like saying that my time with her would have been better spent elsewhere. To not allow myself to have that again would be the same as saying I regretted what I had before, and I can never do that.”] There was plenty Rhea regretted, but never that. [+lightcoral “I know it will not be the same for each and every person, but that is what is true for me.”] It might not have even been what was right for her in her past life, but for the Rhea she was here and now, this was how she felt.
Taking in a long, slow breath, she held it for a moment before letting it out in a similar manner. [+lightcoral “… by that line of thinking,”] she refered to his idea of her being a child who kept reaching for the stove. [+lightcoral “I might as well end it all to avoid all potential hurt. Why keep living if there is a chance I might end up in pain? Would it be better to shatter my core so that I save my next iteration from something that could potentially leave her heartbroken?”] It was a series of rhetorical questions, because she already had the answer. [+lightcoral “No, that would be absurd. Life is more than just avoiding things that hurt. At least, for me it is.”] Her lips turned up into a melancholy smile. She was trying to be positive, even if she didn’t feel all that hopeful herself.
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